Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 22, 2016

But that thing with the ribbon and ball is considered a sport.

How about utensil juggling? Flying forks can be dangerous.

I’m still trying to understand making surfing a sport for the next Summer Olympics. Does that mean that every host city has to be by the ocean from here on?

Synchronized eating will have a draw-back, one of the eaters will choke on the meal.

No question we Americans will win gold in that event.

@leftwingpatriotI was talking about eating. Surfing, yes, that would be a closer competition.

I specialize in synchronized sleeping.

Rat is right. If the IOC figures out a way to make money and obtain bribes from it, it will be “Hello, synchronized eating!”

Synchronized farting… PLEASE make that an event.

I wonder it those two burp in tandem?

What about speed eating?

wouldn’t be any worse than solo synchonized swimming which they had some time back.

It will if they are eating BACON!!!

more synchronized crocs, eh?

Why not? Everything else is an Olympic sport these days. Of course, if the Olympics are held in Australia, the competitors will be fed Vegemite.

I will never understand why two guys beating the crap out of each other is a sport.

I specialize in synchronized sleeping.:You mean two or more people sleeping together in perfect rhythm? I think you can find some movies like that if you look hard enough.

It makes as much sense as synchronized

It can’t be now that the Olympics are over.

Steph…no mixed case text in pearls. What’s that about? Are you yelling at us?

What exactly does the Olympics accomplish (aside from billions in advertising revenue)? Does it’s carbon footprint justify it’s continuance? If the planet and all life on it is in great peril, shouldn’t we eliminate such unnecessary things first. Just a thought…

At last! A sport in which I might actually be competitive (at least the eating part; I’m not sure my coordination would be good enough for the synchronized aspect)….Are you listening, IOC?

Synchronized Masticating…. that’ll get their attention.

Guess he had a rush of creation around olympics time.

Any way you look at it, synchronized eating has got to be more interesting than synchronized swimming will ever be. Talk about having way too much time on their hands… and Liverlips McCracken, the IOC will INVENT a way to make money off of it.

I feel like rat’s been nicer to pig lately?