Reality Check by Dave Whamond for March 29, 2017

Actually, the English language involves a whole lot of conquerors and conquerees to explain its growth. That’s also why it can evolve so easily.

English…the language misspoken by more people than any other…

to speek gut englush ya gatta hit da bar foist….

It is tricky, but that still doesn’t excuse not knowing the difference between there, their and they’re!

Lots of special cases.

Tossed: but if you do, you’re a grammar Nazi.Also, the plural of spouse is spice.

If you say so.

Wait…. what?

the language has evolved many idiosyncrasies throughout its development

And the plural of half is whole (credit Alan Sherman).

As the father on the old “Dobie Gillis” show was wont to say:“That makes sense. Not to me, but that makes sense.”

So who do you pronounce the sound made by ‘ough’. Well let us add letters.Tough Trough Through Thoroughor Tough Though Thought

I guess I still don’t know.

Do the houses have mouses or do the hice have mice?

Is it just me, or is Ralph tryin’ to do a bad imitation of Yoda? Did Yoda ever use contractions?

Ghoti can be pronounced “fish.” Take the “gh” from enough, the “o” from women and the “ti” from carnation. Fish.

I take it you already knowOf tough and bough and cough and dough?Others may stumble, but not you,On hiccough, thorough, lough and through?Well done! And now you wish, perhaps,To learn of less familiar traps?Beware of heard, a dreadful wordThat looks like beard and sounds like bird,And dead: it’s said like bed, not bead -For goodness sake don’t call it deed!Watch out for meat and great and threat(They rhyme with suite and straight and debt).A moth is not a moth in mother,Nor both in bother, broth in brother,And here is not a match for thereNor dear and fear for bear and pear,And then there’s dose and rose and lose -Just look them up – and goose and choose,And cork and work and card and ward,And font and front and word and sword,And do and go and thwart and cart -Come, come, I’ve hardly made a start!A dreadful language? Man alive!I’d mastered it when I was five!