Close to Home by John McPherson for October 14, 2018

Take it away! I changed my mind!

Why does she need that? She is just going to lie to herself and everyone else about how much exercise she does everyday

It’s accurate on time of death to within 2 hours, or your money back…and we never give money back. I’ll leave it up to you to figure our why. Caveat Emptor.

Is that two hours before or after the warranty runs out?

It also comes with a 250 ft. extension cord or, for a little more, the 50 lb. bag of batteries in a designer bag by your feet.

It’s guaranteed to kill you within two hours of strapping it on.

Just wait until 5G technology launches. It will get worse especially the commercials.

Uh, a little too much information, if you ask me!

Oddly enough they all die of colon cancer.

I don’t think I will bother!!! I see you Alien!!!

Paging Professor Pinero…

Hi Little Alien Dude!!!!!!!!!!! Happy Sunday all!!!!!!!!!!!!! :)