Scary Gary by Mark Buford for May 17, 2019

Owen does stand up? I never would have guessed. The ghost of Don Rickles?

Gary underestimated Owen’s abilities to capture the funny bone of the virus…

There you go, Owen; get the enemy to come over to your side by inventing a third party foil. Works every time.

Gary’s so fat, that when he goes camping, the bears hide their food.

Fat? Gary’s got a group insurance policy.

Fat? He was standing on the corner the other day, and the cops came by and told him to break it up.

He stepped on the scale at Walmart and it said,“One at a time, please.”

Gary is so fat that even his fat has fats.

Gary’s got more chins than a Chinese phone book.

Gary is so fat he can’t go to the beach any more. It messes with the tides.

Gary’s so fat he has more chins than a Chinese phone book…

I’m thinking he is succeeding…

My favorite is: “He’s so fat that when he lounges around the house, he lounges around the house…”

Everyone makes fun of Gary. It’s so easy, it’s scary….