Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for April 14, 2011

Wiz! You forgot the fourth thing. Make the Fink disappear.

But you could change all the other competitors into toads.

He should’ve said “death, taxes and that golf swing”. Much better for this time of year, and yes, he’s given out love potions before.

DICTIONARY.COM has this to say (the last paragraph is to me the most interesting):

golf   /gɒlf, gɔlf; Brit. also gɒf/ Show Spelled [golf, gawlf; Brit. also gof] Show IPA

–noun

a game in which clubs with wooden or metal heads are used to hit a small, white ball into a number of holes, usually 9 or 18, in succession, situated at various distances over a course having natural or artificial obstacles, the object being to get the ball into each hole in as few strokes as possible. a word used in communications to represent the letter G. –verb (used without object) to play golf.

——————————————————————————–

Origin: 1425–75; late Middle English; of uncertain origin

—Related forms golf·er, noun non·golf·er, noun Dictionary.com Unabridged Based on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2011. Cite This Source | Link To golf

World English Dictionary golf (ɡɒlf)

— n

a. a game played on a large open course, the object of which is to hit a ball using clubs, with as few strokes as possible, into each of usually 18 holes b. ( as modifier ): a golf bag

— vb

( intr ) to play golf

[C15: perhaps from Middle Dutch colf club ]

Golf (ɡɒlf)

— n communications a code word for the letter g

Collins English Dictionary - Complete & Unabridged 10th Edition 2009 © William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1979, 1986 © HarperCollins Publishers 1998, 2000, 2003, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2009

golf

1457, Scot. gouf, usually taken as an alteration of M.Du. colf, colve “stick, club, bat,” from P.Gmc. *kulth- (cf. O.N. kolfr “clapper of a bell,” Ger. Kolben “mace, club”). The game is from 14c., the word is first mentioned (along with fut-bol ) in a 1457 Scot. statute on forbidden games. Online Etymology Dictionary, © 2010 Douglas Harper

Golf? Mentioned in a Scottish statute on forbidden games? Maybe the Fink’s example is why.

Hey, the King’s golf swing is similar to mine.

Who cares, you know who’s going win in the Fink’s foursome.

“I’d rather have a cobra in my bag than a hook.”

Ben Hogan

My, that is too bad. :-)

He should play mini golf instead.

Love , death, & taxes; contain their own magic. The Fink’s swing, on the other hand, sucks magic from the realm.

Hook, line, and Stinker!

I remember reading that Mary Queen of Scots (16th century) the mother of James I (VI), played golf and that the word “golf” is an acronym (can’t remember what the letters stood for)

The acronym Golf stands for “Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden”

But Wiz has made love potions before. That would contradict that first one.