(The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump’s decision to talk to Bob Woodward demonstrates the downside of never having read a book in his entire life, experts say.
While millions of Americans were astonished that Trump would voluntarily speak at great length to an author famous for his takedowns of Presidents, experts believe that a total obliviousness to books and what is inside them might have played a pivotal role.
Davis Logsdon, a University of Minnesota professor who studies the psychology of people who have never read a book in their lives, said that such people might be overconfident about how they would be portrayed if a book were ever written about them.
“If you’ve never read a book in your life, you might be under the impression that all books are flattering,” he said. “You would have no idea that a book could portray you as a human dumpster fire.”
As for Trump, Logsdon said that the President would “definitely benefit” from reading a book someday, but added, “It’s a little late for that now.”
In the final analysis, based on almost 30 years of experience researching conspiracy theories, I can only conclude that QAnon is the ultimate catfish scheme for the 21st century.
P.T. Barnum uttered some wise words in this context. (Maybe you’ve heard them.)
Media manipulation has spilled out well beyond the borders of Hollywood.
The real battleground for the minds of Americans is Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, Reddit, 8kun, etc. That’s why we’re now seeing books and documentaries (like “Out of Shadows”) that claim to reveal the influence of Hollywood. ✁
That’s why I subtitled my first book “Conspiracy Theory as Art Form.” Conspiracy theories are an art form, and they’re now being used to create elaborate fictions deployed to support those in power.
We’re told this is a free country. If so, everyone has the right to vote for whoever they want in this year’s election. If your informed research leads you to vote for Donald Trump, feel free.
I would suggest, however, that if you vote for Trump for any of the following reasons, you’ve been had:
Because you think he’s a devout, Satanist-exterminating Christian;
Because you think he’s going to screw over a secret cabal of cultish “black hats” by abolishing the income tax;
Because you think he’s going to reveal the existence of Tesla-derived free energy to the world at some point after November of 2020;
Because you think he’s liberating thousands of sexually abused children locked up in Illuminati conclaves hidden within or below U.S. military bases;
Because you think he’s going to save your flesh from being masticated by the blood-spattered fangs of subterranean beasts.
I may not know much, and there aren’t too many words I could ever utter that one might actually take to the bank, but I can guarantee you this:
President Donald J. Trump is not going to prevent you from being eaten by demons.
kaffekup over 4 years ago
Nobody’s gonna bail us out. We have to do it ourselves.
fuzzbucket Premium Member over 4 years ago
Has anyone seen a useful vaccine around here?
Durak Premium Member over 4 years ago
Lost your way?
I give you brains, empower you with reason. Hands with opposable thumbs even! A sense of right and wrong. Use my gifts for good, that’s all I ask.
Listen, kid. You know what you should do. The problem is, it takes effort. However, the path is clear. All you have to do is take a slight LEFT turn.
Don’t let yourselves down. Again.
rossevrymn over 4 years ago
God is telling you, Carmen, to ditch Stantisfernuthin.
Silly Season over 4 years ago
(The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump’s decision to talk to Bob Woodward demonstrates the downside of never having read a book in his entire life, experts say.
While millions of Americans were astonished that Trump would voluntarily speak at great length to an author famous for his takedowns of Presidents, experts believe that a total obliviousness to books and what is inside them might have played a pivotal role.
Davis Logsdon, a University of Minnesota professor who studies the psychology of people who have never read a book in their lives, said that such people might be overconfident about how they would be portrayed if a book were ever written about them.
“If you’ve never read a book in your life, you might be under the impression that all books are flattering,” he said. “You would have no idea that a book could portray you as a human dumpster fire.”
As for Trump, Logsdon said that the President would “definitely benefit” from reading a book someday, but added, “It’s a little late for that now.”
Silly Season over 4 years ago
In the final analysis, based on almost 30 years of experience researching conspiracy theories, I can only conclude that QAnon is the ultimate catfish scheme for the 21st century.
P.T. Barnum uttered some wise words in this context. (Maybe you’ve heard them.)
Media manipulation has spilled out well beyond the borders of Hollywood.
The real battleground for the minds of Americans is Twitter, YouTube, Facebook, Reddit, 8kun, etc. That’s why we’re now seeing books and documentaries (like “Out of Shadows”) that claim to reveal the influence of Hollywood. ✁
That’s why I subtitled my first book “Conspiracy Theory as Art Form.” Conspiracy theories are an art form, and they’re now being used to create elaborate fictions deployed to support those in power.
We’re told this is a free country. If so, everyone has the right to vote for whoever they want in this year’s election. If your informed research leads you to vote for Donald Trump, feel free.
I would suggest, however, that if you vote for Trump for any of the following reasons, you’ve been had:
Because you think he’s a devout, Satanist-exterminating Christian;
Because you think he’s going to screw over a secret cabal of cultish “black hats” by abolishing the income tax;
Because you think he’s going to reveal the existence of Tesla-derived free energy to the world at some point after November of 2020;
Because you think he’s liberating thousands of sexually abused children locked up in Illuminati conclaves hidden within or below U.S. military bases;
Because you think he’s going to save your flesh from being masticated by the blood-spattered fangs of subterranean beasts.
I may not know much, and there aren’t too many words I could ever utter that one might actually take to the bank, but I can guarantee you this:
President Donald J. Trump is not going to prevent you from being eaten by demons.
~
https://www.salon.com/2020/09/13/what-are-the-true-goals-of-qanon-its-the-21st-centurys-ultimate-catfish-scheme/
Kip W over 4 years ago
Supernatural thinking did so much to get us into this, yet I find it hard to believe it’ll get us out.
streetbeater over 4 years ago
“How do you know you’re God?”
“Every time I pray, I find I’m talking to myself.”
RobinHood over 4 years ago
We name the things we see as wrong
We name our nation’s sins
We preach and plead for honesty
And healing to begin
We cry for social justice from sea to shining sea
But let’s be distracted, let’s not be deceived
For we battle not with flesh and blood
And the governments of men
For all have fallen short of God
And all, have surely sinned
So in force we’ll take our country
To the battlefields of prayer
Where on our knees, we will see victory declared
Wake Up Americam By The Dawn’s Early Light.
Terry Talbot