Wizard of Id Classics by Parker and Hart for November 26, 2020

That’s one way of stopping the rot….

It’s “. . . only one cavity!” and “. . . only 3 teeth left.” “Only” is THE MOST OFTEN MISPLACED word in English. Here’s a humorous list of how to use “only” to modify what YOU INTENDED TO MODIFY from the get-go:

Only I poked him in his eye with my stick.

I only poked him in his eye with my stick.

I poked only him in his eye with my stick.

I poked him only in his eye with my stick.

I poked him in his only eye with my stick.

I poked him in his eye only with my stick.

I poked him in his eye with my only stick.

I poked him in his eye with my stick only.

I only brush the ones I want to keep.

I’ve watched quite a few documentaries where skeletons from the Middle Ages have been unearthed. The striking thing is how most of them have full sets of teeth in perfect condition. No sugar! I have tooth envy.

Guess they better stick to farming vegetables if he’s gonna go to gumming his food. Wonder if that’s why the English of several decades back are known for boiling everything they ate.

You can have sugar but brush afterwards….LOL, Yeah, right!

Sounds like one of my sisters!

“Musta’ been the Mail Pouch – Tain’t candified”…

Recalling the Crest Toothpaste commercials of the 1950s and’60s.

And his mother brings him down to earth.

3 teeth, only one cavity, could be worse!