Monty by Jim Meddick for April 07, 2022

Choc, Choc, Chocolatey. Chew, Chew, Chewy

Junior put that back in the toilet!

“It’s no big deal”.

https://youtu.be/1YDurhx8QyA

Skat? In what language does that translate from. And the size of that tootsie roll? Gonna’ need to put in a couple of stitches.

Jarvis having Sedgewick fetch something? That’s a new one.

OK, I get it now, the mild mannered Jarvis is really the “Chameleon”, easily deceiving the dim witted little master. Bravo old boy, you’re invisible!

Years ago, instead of telling their kids the goldfish had died, my friends put the bowl on top of the fridge and only mom and dad could “feed” (or “see”) the fish. They had just moved and it was a huge upheaval for kids, so they did this to avoid more drama/trauma

British spelling is ‘scat’; it doesn’t make it into some American English dictionaries. Webster’s has it; animal waste, root of the word is the same as ‘scatological’.

Instead of playing with his head, they should get a replacement chameleon.

I remember when I was little my aunt would tell my cousins the dog “ran away”.

And even more amazing that it’s tastes like a Tootsie Roll!

Kids big brother was good at a game at the fair and would win cute little ducklings every year. They grew large over the summer and then would “fly south for the winter”. The family had roast duck for Christmas every year.

Tootsie roll sized scat! That’s one big lizard!

At this point the brat is gonna fire him for lying to him for so long.

You’re a sly one, Jarvis. :)

A scat story:

The young couple on their honeymoon were about to spend the week camping in Yellowstone, but first they had to listen to the ranger’s orientation speech. He was particularly emphatic about bears. “They’re a protected species, so we’ve got lots of them, but they’re still dangerous. Don’t approach them under any circumstances. And don’t try to outrun them; they’re faster than you are. And climbing a tree won’t help, either; they’re better at it than you.”

The nervous groom asked what they could do about it.

“Well, some people stop by the gift shop and pick up wristlets or anklets with little bells. Sometimes if they hear you coming, they’ll move off before you get there. You can also get cans of pepper spray in case you surprise one. Oh, and be on the lookout for fresh bear scat; that’s a sign that they’re around and you might want to leave.”

“What’s scat?” asked the bride.

“Bear droppings. You can tell what kind of bear it is by what their poop looks like. The smaller ones, black bears, have scat that’s kind of firm and roundish, like dark ping-pong balls. The really dangerous guys, the big grizzlies, have softer, flatter, lighter-colored droppings, kind of like cowpies, except they usually have little bells and smell like pepper.”

This arc just gets funnier and funnier Jim! Nice! Thanks!

And again Faithful Jarvis dupes Young Master into thinking Milton lives (and defecates tootsie-roll turds)….

Hey! I’m a Milton. I keep my house/cage perfectly clean. Hmmmph.

His father’s fortune is in good hands. Although if he’s fair to all Jarvis has a nice BIG surprise coming

Oh, that’s really gonna make us want to eat Tootsie Rolls (hope the cartoonist doesn’t get sued).