Drabble by Kevin Fagan for January 03, 2023

gotta have SOME balance, lady.

That’s the plan right Ralph. Just keep jogging back and forth by the donut shop.

I think that those two things would cancel each other out.

Hilarity starts today?

So Ralph will be in perpetual jog?

Running away from her will be good for your mental health too.

I think that’s Honey Bunches resolution for him.

Notice how SMALL the hole in the donut is. . .

That can actually work, if you are willing to actually do it. A mile run every day will raise your base metabolism enough that you can eat that donut without consequence.

But I defy anyone to have the will power to do this for longer than a week. I suspect most people would quit on day 3.

I used to jog. I loved it. I have a treadmill now. It’s exercise but not nearly as much fun.

Run until you eat half the donut, run back as you finish it, get another donut, and repeat. It is better than just eating a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts before you finish the drive home. Honestly, I have done that.

That reminds me of John Belushi with his little chocolate donuts and cigarettes.

You’ve got to be in pretty good shape to eat donuts while running.

So you can build up an appetite for more donuts.

He should do something even better! Like jog TO the donut shop as well as jogging from it. And only if the donut shop is at least a quarter, of a mile away, or farther…

For Ralph, that’s progress.

Strangely enough, that does seem like a good start — if he can stick to his resolution. Then if he stops jogging, he has to stop eating donuts. If he stays with the jogging, he’ll be burning up calories and getting a good workout even while consuming the less-than-desirable calories.

I think this crazy bish is stalking him….