Rabbits Against Magic by Jonathan Lemon for July 03, 2023

They were in Dallas, after all. Ellie Mae did it!

It’s all in the classified documents found with Trump, the very same found on Hillary’s email server.

It’s as good a theory as any

i was 10 years old, in 5th grade English class when our principal made the announcement in tears, and i turned to my buddy Steve sitting next to me and said “It was the Mafia.”

Yeah, we never should have let George Lucas near the Zapruder film…

“Yes, I bet you have.”

Mr. Wiggly: 1st panel, hidin’ away in case Preston decides to start shooting.

I used to work with some politically conservative people. Like Preston they believed in many goofy conspiracy theories about J.F.K.s assassination. They’d get on my case because I didn’t believe in any looney conspiracy idea.

This subject is not funny! Or humorous!

Back in the sixties, I read of lot of JFK-conspiracy stuff. I don’t favour any particular theory over the conventional knowledge, but I’m aware that there were a number of fishy things going on besides the obvious. A character loudly claiming to be Oswald in Dallas at a time when the FBI definitely placed him in Mexico City; the notorious inaccuracy of the rifle; the barely-damaged “magic bullet”; Oswald’s quickly regaining citizenship after his return to the US; the conflicting autopsy sketch and report; stuff like that. It could well be coincidence or happenstance or bad reporting, sure. We do know that the Warren Commission was pressured to come up with a quick and single-shooter conclusion in order to make Americans feel better (or something like that), but that sure backfired.

A conspiracy theorist dies and for some reason goes to Heaven. He meets God, who tells him that Oswald was the lone assassin. “Wow,” he says, “I had no idea of just how high up that conspiracy goes.”

Most all the creators of JFK conspiracy theories have been smoking the grassy knoll