Texts From Mittens by Angie Bailey for June 25, 2024

I’m with Mitty on this one.

I used to have a neighbor with an alcohol problem. When he’d get sloshed, he’d start up his lawn mower in the middle of the night and try to mow his cement driveway and the road in front of his house.

Oh, yuck! She’s gonna have to start going by Stinky Patty.

We know you’d never actually read one of those trashy gossip tabloids, Mittens.

Did Drunk Patty still have her tube top and Daisy Dukes on at the time?

Even for Drunk Patty this is a very low bar. Maybe she should open a place called The Low Bar

She is called Drunk Patty for a reason.

Wait. What?! Where did D.P. and the F.H. take their bath?

Good one, Mittens.

Picking up dog habits of hair drying. I tried that “shaking the head to assist trying thing” – ONCE. Such a headache. If you notice the dog’s head barely moves when they do that body shake.

At least she was indoors this time, and not bathing in a barrel in the yard.