We are travelling in Japan as vegetarians, with two kids who aren’t mad on Japanese food. One evening after a day of sightseeing and then finding medicine for my partner who gets sick, pizza seems like the best option.
The kids and I rock up in the dark at a random pizza place that I thought from the name was casual, but turns out to be a fully booked, upscale, buffalo-mozzarella-flown-in-from-Italy fancy. It’s 7.30 pm on a Friday night, we have no booking, and look fairly scruffy. If we can’t eat here, then I have no idea what we will be eating.
The staff, bless them, find us space out the back and bring us a menu in English and then magnificent pizza. We wolf it down and get out of their hair. But on the way out my eleven-year-old kid announces:
Kid: “It’s the best pizza I’ve ever eaten… and I’ve been to Italy!”
An Exciting Page In The Big Book Of Petty Revenge Strategies
Back when payphones were still around and pagers were the “in” thing, my dad had a handyman business. He would get charged each time someone paged him, so he only gave the number to special clients.
One day, he came home fuming mad.
Dad: “I got a page and pulled over to use a payphone and called the number expecting it to be one of my clients!”
Me: “It wasn’t?”
Dad: “It was someone who set up an autodial on their computer! I called the number back, and it was an advertisement for their company! It just played the advertisement and then said, ‘Leave a message if you want more info,’ and nothing else! That s*** cost me money!”
Me: “We should fight fire with fire.”
I set up my PC to call that number on repeat, and when it answered it would play a sound file that said, “You are an idiot! HA HA HA HA HA!”
I set it to repeat, and we went out to dinner. When we came back a couple of hours later, the computer was getting a busy signal when dialing. I’d filled up that guy’s answering machine.
I waited a few days, called the number again, and left a message that said if he ever autodialed people’s pagers again, I’d make sure his number could never be used, and I’d even call the main line for his company and fill that up. You cost people money when you do that.
Yakety Sax 3 months ago
Nothing Okonomi-yucky About This Service
We are travelling in Japan as vegetarians, with two kids who aren’t mad on Japanese food. One evening after a day of sightseeing and then finding medicine for my partner who gets sick, pizza seems like the best option.
The kids and I rock up in the dark at a random pizza place that I thought from the name was casual, but turns out to be a fully booked, upscale, buffalo-mozzarella-flown-in-from-Italy fancy. It’s 7.30 pm on a Friday night, we have no booking, and look fairly scruffy. If we can’t eat here, then I have no idea what we will be eating.
The staff, bless them, find us space out the back and bring us a menu in English and then magnificent pizza. We wolf it down and get out of their hair. But on the way out my eleven-year-old kid announces:
Kid: “It’s the best pizza I’ve ever eaten… and I’ve been to Italy!”
Thank you, friendly pizza restaurant staff!
Yakety Sax 3 months ago
An Exciting Page In The Big Book Of Petty Revenge Strategies
Back when payphones were still around and pagers were the “in” thing, my dad had a handyman business. He would get charged each time someone paged him, so he only gave the number to special clients.
One day, he came home fuming mad.
Dad: “I got a page and pulled over to use a payphone and called the number expecting it to be one of my clients!”
Me: “It wasn’t?”
Dad: “It was someone who set up an autodial on their computer! I called the number back, and it was an advertisement for their company! It just played the advertisement and then said, ‘Leave a message if you want more info,’ and nothing else! That s*** cost me money!”
Me: “We should fight fire with fire.”
I set up my PC to call that number on repeat, and when it answered it would play a sound file that said, “You are an idiot! HA HA HA HA HA!”
I set it to repeat, and we went out to dinner. When we came back a couple of hours later, the computer was getting a busy signal when dialing. I’d filled up that guy’s answering machine.
I waited a few days, called the number again, and left a message that said if he ever autodialed people’s pagers again, I’d make sure his number could never be used, and I’d even call the main line for his company and fill that up. You cost people money when you do that.
He never called again.
FreyjaRN Premium Member 3 months ago
What few I have are the same as Aunty’s.
Macushlalondra 3 months ago
Oh is that what they’re called? I have them too. They make me look angry when I’m not.
[Traveler] Premium Member 3 months ago
Red on Angry Birds looks angry because of his eyebrows. And once on Seinfeld, uncle Leo had his painted on and everyone thought he was angry.
ChessPirate 3 months ago
ᔑ(ಠ`ʊ̯´ಠ)ᔐ
jango 3 months ago
But I thought it took fewer facial muscles to smile than to frown?
CorkLock 3 months ago
Please Aunty, you got a scary fat WTF face ole gal.
Daltongang Premium Member 3 months ago
Aunty, who are you trying to kid anyway? Everyone knows that drunks age faster than their sober counterparts.
cuzinron47 3 months ago
After reading this, my WTF lines showed up.
rockyridge1977 3 months ago
You earned …..you keep em!!!!