Rubes by Leigh Rubin for July 12, 2024

So, be a Knight of the Seven Kingdoms?

Tchah! Can you picture an adult Batman with those skinny legs & that gut? Won’t get the hot chicks, THAT’S for sure!

Not quite Junior Birdmen glasses, but I still hope young Bruce turned his box tops in!

So, you’re saying Bruce murdered his parents to set the whole thing into motion?

And drive like a maniac in a snazzy two-seater. Oh, and ogle Cat Woman.

Kraglin: What are you gonna do with your share?Nebula: As a child, my father would have Gamora and me battle one another in training. Every time my sister prevailed… my father would replace a piece of me with machinery, claiming he wanted me to be her equal. But she won… again and again, and again, never once refraining. So after I murder my sister, I will buy a warship with every conceivable instrument of death. I will hunt my father like a dog, and I will tear him apart slowly… piece by piece, until he knows some semblance of the profound and unceasing pain I knew every single day.Kraglin: Yeah… I was talking about, like, a pretty necklace. Or a nice hat. You know. Something to make the other girls go “Ooh, that’s nice.”

forgetaboutit. stop Robin your youth with such nonsense

I wonder what career day was like at his school.

He had his plans made, right off the bat.

And invent the most hilariously ridiculous dance ever!

And be stinking rich