Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for June 21, 1998

Transcript:

the nerrex corporation would like to respond to those who have condemned nerrex's recent testing of an atomic bomb as a horrifically irresponsible corporate action. We accept that criticism. it is true that some overzealous journalists have uncovered documents proving that every single shareholder, director and manager of nerrex approved the testing. even i, a corporate spokesman, was involved in the decision. however, the corporation itself regrets the act of these individuals and it apologizes. there is currently a spontaneous grass-roots swelling of support for nerrex, and there will soon be a flood of approving letters to the editor written by prominent intellectuals. but those second amendment-haters who say that this should lead to greater regulation of nuclear weapons... let us say that a nuclear bomb did not detonate itself. and a corporation didn't do it. A person did. here is that person. we suggest he be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. nerrex. it's a corporation. don't blame it for your sins.