Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 31, 2009
May 30, 2009
June 01, 2009
Transcript:
Danny Donkey died and went to heaven. At the pearly gates, St. Peter reviewed Danny's entire life. Man says, "You sat on the couch and drank beer." Danny Donkey defended himself. Danny Donkey says, "Sometimes I recycled the can." Unimpressed, St. Peter condemned Danny to a life of eternal torment. "Wait," argued Danny, "You're not letting me in but you're letting that guy in?" "Which guy?" replied St. Peter. "That guy behind you," said Danny Donkey. St. Peter turned to look." And Danny hopped the fence. Goat says, "This is the book you want to title 'Danny Donkey's guide to eternal salvation?" Rat says, "Yeah. That, or 'Distracting St. Peter for dummies.'" Pig says, "I will buy ten!!"
slimbrownweed almost 13 years ago
man,i wonder how many letters this one got…and how many explosive packges.
mld1812 over 12 years ago
wow
m.l. about 12 years ago
Pelahnar almost 12 years ago
Personally, I would’ve just made a logical argument. True, Danny Donkey did nothing productive with his life – but on the other hand, he didn’t really hurt anyone did he? Why should he be eternally tormented for simply doing nothing?
Clearstream about 8 years ago
Don’t worry Pig. You will certainly be getting into whatever heaven might exist. (dang it, I can’t say this without sounding religious/atheist.)
BOSFLASH over 5 years ago
In the elder pharaoh’s tomb was a ladder for each side, just in case.
One Navy Seal over 4 years ago
This is not how the afterlife works, and I haven’t even died! Yet!
DragonNerd almost 4 years ago
If they won’t let you to heaven jump the fence clap clap if they don’t let you to heaven jump the fence clap clap If you won’t get into heaven and ya wanna be a heathen if ya won’t get into heaven jump the fence clap clap
Boxo croco says happy derby about 3 years ago
Rats gonna need that trick
alantain over 1 year ago
You’d think heaven would be hellish for him.