FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for October 25, 2011

I can’t give my blood away because I lived in England for 2 years. Or would vampires don’t mind?

Ta-DA Instant V8

Drinks and food are usually set to expire 3-6 days before they actually go bad. It makes sure stores don’t accidentally sell some spoiled products. Day after juice would be fine.

You don’t have to be a prissy girl like Paige to find that disgusting. Jason, eating expired goods just to give someone a quick scare isn’t worth it. Prepare for vomiting.

If properly canned, that tomato juice would probably still be okay for years after its so-called expiration date. It does not magically become poisonous one day after expiration.

I might also point out that for food products, only baby foods and some milk products have true “expiration dates.” The others are “guaranteed fresh” dates, meaning that it might lose flavor, color, or nutritional value, but it will still be safe.

Even the “expiration date” on milk is far from being accurate if kept properly refrigerated ( in the back of the refrigerator). I have kept milk over a month after its expiration date before it started to “turn” (curdle), using it occasionally.

Tomato juice is so acidic, it probably would never become hazardous, or even really go bad. It will eventually eat through the can and leak out, given the chance…

I’d use Mountain Dew Code Red. That stuff could survive a nuclear war and you could still drink it.

I would have said the expiration date was last year.

i just bought milk that died right on its expiration date like clockwork