The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for October 28, 2011

All you viagra users best remember this!!

What a woodie.

Comes from sticking your nose in where it doesn’t belong, or what doesn’t belong there in your nose. (Nuts, Dogsniff. You beat me to the booger.)

You can pick your friends & you can pick your nose but you can’t pick your friends’ nose.

Unless you’re REALLY good friends.

Cutting off the nose … to spike the fees.

Maybe he could take See-ah-Lies.

Me: It’s been three and a half hours – maybe it’s time to go to the emergency room…My Wife: Not ‘til I’m done with it!

Breaking News – Movie star Pinocchio kidnapped by a group of female squirrels.

Proboscis erectus.

I’m hearing Wayland’s Madame exclaiming, “Lie, you crazy puppet, lie!!”

Who needs a chainsaw to cut thru an inch of wood? Oh, right: It’s just faster and cooler.

[cough]

Where is he getting peanut butter sized jars of Lie-Agra?? I have to pay top dollar for little packets.He must be getting it wholesale online from New Zealand.

I never have that problem, all I have to do is see Alice.

Only he nose the truth.

Lying is hazardous to your nose!

I’m thinking that a sabre saw might be more appropriate, or a heavy duty lopping shears…

Nurse Prudence is planning on saving the specimen…

Wrong drug!