Daddy's Home by Tony Rubino and Gary Markstein for June 16, 2017

Elliott is such a dirt twerp. (Close enough?)

Tony asked, about 7 hours ago

Are you neat?

Well, I’m kinda neat, as people go, I like to think…. and I suppose I’m some sort of freak….

but I’m not a “neat freak,”

Cos I think you mean am I “tidy” …

and, um…. well…. no.

If a messy desk is a sign of a brilliant mind, I’m a genius.

Very big grin to everybody – I know why I like it here!

pfft …. no.

The rare occasions that I drink liquor, I like it neat…does that count?

Neat?…..Can you spell that again?

And Elliot’s a freak of nature.

I’m certainly not a neat freak, but again, neither would I condone shod feet on my dinner table.

@Tony:

Am I neat? A lot of people tell me I am, but I think they’re using slang…! But it would be really neat if you all would consider answering today’s…

Second “Daddy’s Home” Question:

Anything wrong with you?

I am rather tidy – but only compared to my mum, who was a hoarder. (Why would a 85 year old woman who lived in a third floor apartment have a garden hose under her bed? Or a crinoline petticoat from the 50s in her closet?)

I am clean. I clean up after 2 room mates. It has its own rewards but sometimes I want to scream at them. But thats what passive aggressivess want.

I feel sorry for your future wife Elliot.