Fowl Language by Brian Gordon for July 28, 2020

Shouldn’t the yellow mean go faster?

Oy!

What pearlsbs said, yellow means go, go, go, unless it’s a red light camera

and from what I’ve seen, red only means stop if someone is gonna catch you, or hit you. I’ve seen one too many accidents where red did not mean stop at all.

Remember when people used to actually go when the light turned green and not after the person behind them honked for the second time?

Not to MUTCD standards, Brian.

I thought it was Green = GoYellow = Go like hell!Red = Go anyway (for the first 3 seconds) then Stop and look annoyed! (after 3 seconds)

Yes!!! Drives me nuts. And when you honk to alert them that the light turned green 10 seconds ago, they give you the finger, speed like heck almost hitting something, and you are stuck at a red light again.

Love the video where someone honks and the dummy on the phone drops it on the floor. I keep trying to do that.

Did anyone ever see the episode a yellow Taxi where Rev. Jim takes his driving test : " What does a yellow light mean? " Everyone " Slow down" Rev Jim ; (slowing his voice down ) “What does a yellow light mean?” (well the clip is on you tube…you’d have to see it to believe it ;-) )

If only the problem was at stop lights.

20 years ago I was heading home when the engine on my Volvo threw a rod. Yes, a Volvo. No, not a yuppie-mobile. It was a 1966 Amazon 120 Coupe with 400k on the engine. I once goosed it above 130 mph and still had 2 inches under the peddle. Man, that thing could move.

Anyway, I throw a rod on the off ramp of a 4 lane highway. Coast up the ramp and pull off on the shoulder and call for a tow. A beautiful day, sunny, in the 70’s, so I sat down on the hood of the car and people watched.

As cars came zooming up the ramp to merge into the thoroughfare I noticed something and started counting. It took 45 minutes for the TT to arrive and in that period I counted in excess of 1000 cars. More than half of the people had a cell phone glued to their ears. On a curved off-ramp with a 35 mph limit.

Remember, this was 2000, not 2020. More than half the people were jabbering away, barely paying attention to the road or the traffic. But at least they were..mostly…looking forward. These days they are staring into their laps.

Sadly, the nation’s roads are swarming with murderous motorists who feel at liberty to play with their goddamn devices irrespective of any rules, signs or signals. They place no value on anyone’s life but their own.

Green should be “STOP PLAYING WITH YOUR PHONE AND THEN GO!”

What … does … yellow … mean ?