Free Range by Bill Whitehead for July 30, 2018

Check, please!

You have to pay extra to fly on the good planes!

Red Green would be proud.

You can fix anything but stupid with duct tape. But duct tape does muffle stupid nicely.

Don’t worry folks, he’s got it covered.

sorry folks!….there will be an extra fee for added duct tape application

Mythbusters proved that that actually would work.

Must’ve been the plane Shatner was on…

I was once on a flight that was sitting at the gate for over an hour fully loaded. There was a loose overhead compartment door. At long last, two highly trained airline mechanics came on board to make the repair. They duct taped it shut. Ready for takeoff!

When duct tape doesn’t work…USE MORE DUCT TAPE.

This looks like a ‘Final Destination’ [the movie] moment.

There’s a special tape for patching airplanes and helicopters. It’s nicknamed “200 mile per hour tape”. But that’s a tad extreme.

In the Army we used to call it 100-mile-an-hour tape, but I think you’d need 700-mile-an-hour-tape for this job. Or wrap 100-mile-an-hour tape 7 times?

Like the Force, duct tape has a light side, a dark side and it binds the Universe together.

Well, I guess a jet engine is a duct of sorts.

All is well.

#haiku — when flying Trump Air / to lower your stress level / don’t choose window seats