Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for June 23, 2016

She seems to relish the prospect, even if it’s not expertly performed.

Is that what you say when you back up to the bumper and miss?

2nd verse same as the first, a little bit louder, a little bit worse.

The fabric of your existence.

Did you ever get that thing where you are operating a machine that beeps all the time and then when you know it isn’t beeping you still hear a beep?No? That’s just weird?Oh. Well, me neither.

Add a few bell and you could be in a casino.

…bleep, bloop…

And what a fetching creature today’s spokesmodel is!

Either is better than tooting.

Actually, mine is. In addition to natural camouflage, I also possess glands that produce poisonous pride, which I can launch a goodly distance, and may be absorbed through the skin. It’s not poisonous to me, naturally, as that would sort of defeat its purpose as a defense mechanism.

Oaks.

I know what you’re thinking, but no… it isn’t the sort of thing that makes one poplar.

Typical audience reaction. Goodness knows, she should have practiced longer before beeping in public!