Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for July 01, 2016

Women can speak for themselves last time I looked.

Women’s armpits are now getting branded twice? OUCH! Even once is a horrible idea! Who comes up with this kind of fashion advice?

You’re just not hanging with the right fetish groups.

Trust me, women can be anxious about every part of their bodies. I wasn’t aware that armpits provoked more anxiety than any other part.(Riding naked on a vine-and-flower decorated horse is not a recommended way to relieve anxiety. Paisley painted ponies are more traditional.)

Hey, underarms can sell more razor blades and deodorants than manly armpits.

Selling products to women to help them “feel more feminine” may not be honest work, but it pays well and the hours are not too demanding.

Death rides on a pale horse, Burrit rides on an adult-color horse.

There’s no end to what women are made to feel anxious about nowadays, particularly when it comes to their bodies. The Establishment doesn’t exist for anyone’s benefit except the so-called 1%, which I think is more like the 0.4%.

If you have to be anxious about some body part, I suppose sweaty “underarms” (a.k.a. armpits) are not the worst possible choice.But, hey, why sweat it?!

I’d like to ride the painted pony along with you Teresa

You’re saying that underarms are no longer the pits??? -BTW… I LOVE the way you sit that pony!!! BRAVO!!!

From having the wrong color hair to toenail fungus, flat derrieres to round tummies, chemicals must be bought, gyms must be joined, and treatments must be administered. And 70 year old men need Viagra or Cialis, risking the dreaded trip to the ER with a four-hour erection, if they want their 30 year old wives to stay with them. I know it’s all true, ’cause I saw it on TV.

Don’t SWEAT it!!!

And thirdly, the code is more what you’d call “guidelines” than actual rules.