Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for April 20, 2018

Whatever’s reasonable excuses.

It does seem odd that she would be asking about the ratty stump of stumpiness.

It pretty much speaks for itself.

OSHA – We Can Help

WOOD CHIPPERS

Key Engineering Controls and Work Practices 

     Do not wear loose-fitting clothing

     Follow the manufacturer’s guidelines and safety instructions

     Guard the feed and discharge ports

     Prevent opening of access doors and covers until the drum or disc has completely stopped

     Prevent detached chippers from sliding or rolling by chocking the trailer wheels

     Maintain a safe distance (2 to 3 log lengths) between the chipper operator

     and other work/individuals

     Never reach into the equipment while it is operating

     Use a lockout system when servicing or maintaining (e.g., “unjamming”) chipping equipment

https://www.osha.gov/SLTC/etools/hurricane/tree-trimming.html#7

(because, if you’re Uncle Sam (or Aunt Teresa), it never hurts to restate the obvious)

“Adjust personal settings before operating equipment.” (Sign on toilet in combined restroom.)

Is he going to ask about her arms, that have grown into her hips?

At least she wasn’t stumped for a comeback.

I will forever pronounce it “wood-chippah” ….

Props to the Eagle Scout! Be Prepared in extremis!

Some people have all the luck. I can’t even afford a wood chipper. (At least, I don’t think so. What do those “dispose of the body” instruments cost, anyway? Any Serial Killer out there who call tell me?)

Just making light conversation.

Anytime someone is talking when their hands on their hips, that is when I tune out. Blah, blah, blah, little girl. Unfortunately, little girls grow up to be the same way.