Gray Matters by Stuart Carlson and Jerry Resler for May 01, 2024

Another at home birth.

I can still hear my 7th grade Social Studies teacher. There was one time when his comment was directed at me. There was a little thread on the shoulder of my blouse. I flicked it off, and it floated to the floor. I then heard: “Do you do that at home? Were you raised in a barn?”

Obviously that teacher had unresolved issues from his upbringing: mother, grandmother or maiden aunts.

You keep the barn door closed so the cows don’t wander off.

When your mom asks you this question, the answer is not “Well you should know, you were there.”

That phrase wasn’t cool when it was “cool”. Somehow I doubt my great grandma (the first person I ever heard use that) gave a hoot either!

Even if you were, you shouldn’t walk around with your barn door open.

My favourite moment in the Peter Gunn series was in the episode “Let’s Kill Timothy,” when Gunn enters Lt. Jacoby’s office, leading on a leash a real, full-size, barking, seal. Jacoby says something like, “Close the door—were you raised in a barn?”