Monty by Jim Meddick for September 18, 2011

Transcript:

I'm very much in need of a nasty puppet act. I'm prepared to offer you a 10% bonus for an exclusive engagement!... Here that, ya lucky schmuck?... Somehow you scammed Mr. Lard $@#$ over there into a 10% raise! Well, I can entertain at weddings, bar mitzvahs and... What? Are you nuts?! Entertain?! Ha! Your act couldn't get laughs from a hyena on nitrous! If you can just give me one more week, I'm sure I'll have the rent... Works bound to pick up soon and... Oh yeah, sure. Any day now... The want ads are just chalk fulla opportunities for ventriloquists! Ha! And they call me a dummy! I wouldn't give this schlub a nickel! Seriously! Look at th' guy! What're th' odds he'll blow it on booze? C'mon, wise up! Help