Reality Check by Dave Whamond for March 01, 2021

Chase it out with the Kars-4-Kids jingle. (Sorry, everyone!)

“Way, hey, tow them away… the Lincoln Park Pirates are we….”

That’s why pirates keep parrots on their shoulders… pluck that thing right out of there.

Arruuuugh!

Fifteen men on a dead man’s chest

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum

Drink and the devil had done for the rest

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.

Love the worm’s lil pirate hat and eye patch!

Is it earworm day? Phoebe and Her Unicorn have one, as well.

Time to play your arrr guitar.

Could have been worse. Could have been baby shark. Oops sorry.

That’s okay, I’ve never heard of it.

I’ve actually had this one stuck in my head a lot (it’s on my running mix). But you can always listen to the Kittyman version: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dN3wEdK_vxw

That’s fine.

Great, now he’s going to need an earpatch.

Shoulda been: Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip, that started from this tropic port aboard this tiny ship…

Or: Come listen to a story about a man named Jed, poor mountaineer barely kept his family fed,then one day he was shootin’ a some food and up thru the ground came a bubbling crude…

I fight earworms with the lyrical styling of Body Count.

♪ Oooooohhhhh!!…..Who lives in a pineapple under da sea!?… ♪

Poor fellow. It’s not even a proper shanty. It’s the sort of song that might be sung when the sailors were not working.

A real shanty is used to help the sailors coordinate their work. It has strong pulses, not a sweet, entertaining delivery.