Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for September 30, 2018

Does speaking Klingon as a second language count?

Less prone? Maybe. My father-in-law is bilingual and currently suffering from Alzheimer’s. So it is certainly no guarantee of preventing it.

If the tank misses its target, does it have to do a lap?

I don’t even know how to swim…and this old dude is out doing it bound and gagged – Amazing!

I can do pig Latin. Will that qualify?

Yane Petkov, I wonder, who did he offend, the ITALIAN MOB or the Russian mafia? Look ou Yane! Next time they will fit you with a pair of concrete boots!

What is not mentioned is Petkov was escaping from his kidnappers.

Is that swimming or a bungled mob hit?

I never realized that tanks could ski! How do they hold the poles? (Capitalize “Poles” and that becomes a decent pun.)

Is that some version of the bagstroke?

I guess I’m sunk…i can barely speak English.

why

There is some recent evidence that eating a lot of leafy green vegetables like spinach, kale and others may help prevent Alzheimer’s. But it is far from proven.

So was Yane just doing a crazy stunt, or did someone try to kill him?

The bilingual thing is a “use it or lose it” kind of thing. But they should have said learn a second language in your later years (or learn to play a musical instrument or do crossword puzzles).

my local paper, the Burlington County Times, [NJ] carried Ripley on Sundays, Go Comics uses the dropped panel version [as it does for other comics as well] and the most interesting ‘believe it or not’ from today was the drop panel, “The Hess Triangle.”

I don’t assess much weight to studies, though I tend to be curious. Often studies knowingly or unknowingly tend to support certain goals. There is no proof yet for medicating cholesterol one way or the other. Two generations were devastated due to loss of bone mass because of questionable motives regarding campaigning against fat from dairy. Now questions are abounding concerning attempting to limit various fats in human diet and diseases which are now more common than previous generations. This is not true merely because more people are living.

To quote Korben Dallas from The Fifth Element: “…Look, lady, I only speak two languages: English and bad English!”

Regarding the “Hess Triangle” story mentioned by Russell Bedford: Here is part of an article on gothamist.com: In 1913 the NY Times reported that “property owners and residents within the line of Seventh Avenue extension from Greenwich Avenue to Varick Street are preparing for the demolition of the buildings within the condemned area.” All in all, 11 blocks were to “be ruthlessly cut through, destroying many curious old residences and businesses.”Hess put up a fight, but eventually lost his property to the city. By 1914, all that remained was the small triangle, measuring in around 27½" x 27½" x 25½". How did this happen? According to a 1928 article that ran in the Hartford Courant (noted here), “Hess’s heirs discovered that, when the city seized the Voorhis, the survey had missed this small corner of the plot.” The city asked the family to donate it, but they refused, and on July 27th, 1922 installed this mosaic, which reads in defiant all caps: “PROPERTY OF THE HESS ESTATE WHICH HAS NEVER BEEN DEDICATED FOR PUBLIC PURPOSES."

Zere is one seeng I find annoyeeng, and zat is zee Frranch stereotype weez zee berray, zee penseel-thin mootache, and zee sherrt weez zee horeezontaal strriypes. But I guess as a Franco-American I’m not a member of a politically-approved “oppressed minority”, so nobody will give a sh-fertilizer.

“And that’s getting off easy, Petkov, so think twice before you criticize Putin again!”