Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for August 20, 2023

Do the hokey-pokey and turn yourself around…..

Are we there yet?

Captain! Spock keeps hitting me!

Never threaten to stop the car … just stop the car. Once, while driving my sister-in-law and her two daughters, the girls were doing their usual sisterly sniping at each other in the back seat. Their mom scolded them, but of course they ignored her. At which point, I took the next off-ramp off the freeway, parked on a quiet street, picked up the book I had been reading earlier, said to the girls “I’ve got all day. Let me know when you’re ready to settle down.” Then I began to read, while silence reigned over my stunned passengers. After a few moments, I asked “You done?” The girls meekly said they were. Then I had to ask their mother, “Okay, where are we, and how do I get back on the freeway?”

- “Marriage stinks, have a kid. Kid stinks, have another kid.”

- ” I’m a SHOE man, born and bred, d#mmit.”

Captain Kirk…with children (right before he clogged the space toilet)

The real threat to these brats would be his announcement to “sing” his own, special cover version of “Rocket Man” if they refused to be quiet…

Don’t, make, me, turn, this, spaceship, around!

D#mmit Jim, I’m a doctor, not a baby sitter!

What a warp’d take off.

Star Trek TNG had kids on board. Would’ve loved to hear Picard, wo disliked kids, utter those words.

Just another tv series gone on far too long.

Louis Anderson’s growing-up years

Spock, could you nerve pinch these little demons, please!

Sigh. Left on Mars with no playmates.

Like Harry Mudd said, starship captains are already married to their vessels.

Little Scotty: “Cap’n, I don’t think I can hold it much longer.”

I mean, Kirk did do the wild thing with a lot of alien women, so him having kids is pretty likely. Unless we assume such relations are more like Larry Niven’s “Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex.”

Very funny, but who is Captain Kirk?…

“To boldly go crazy like no man has gone before.”

Well, you should have gone before we left the Arcturus 4* system! But look at it this way — you’ll be able to go where no one has gone before.

The Perfesser gets spaced out on ‘Starwreck’.