Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for May 08, 2012

  1. Dscf2358 icon ii
    revisages  over 12 years ago

    i was literally laughing aloud when i read yours

     •  Reply
  2. Hillbilly1
    Hillbillyman  over 12 years ago
    I DON’T GET THE PUNCH LINE…APP?
     •  Reply
  3. Avat
    Richard Howland-Bolton Premium Member over 12 years ago

    HillbillymanThere’s an app for everything?? ‘ALAKA-HEIMLICH’ is so funny it’s hard to follow it with any punchline.

     •  Reply
  4. Missing large
    abbatis  over 12 years ago

    So is the APP for indigestion ALAKA-SELTZER?

     •  Reply
  5. Missing large
    tigre1  over 12 years ago

    Did the Heimlich on a little bitty old lady in a restaurant.I’d been a Green Beret ‘A’ team medic and been lifting weights and teaching martial arts for ten years or so…and I wondered if I could do this…I grabbed her from behind, ready to give her the humongest squeeze, AND…suddenly I realized she weighed about as much as an empty sack and wasn’t much bigger around than a broomstick…and scaled it ‘WAY backon the force…! the chunk came out very easily…easiest good deed I’ve ever done, I guess…scariest, too, when I realized how hard I’d been ready to squeeze and shake her…

    Alaka-Heimlich ! is much more deft. Salute, Wiz.

     •  Reply
  6. Cool smiley
    Dewed  over 12 years ago

    They cut out the part … where it goes in her drink

     •  Reply
  7. Missing large
    jdthird  over 12 years ago

    Looked more like there’s a ZAPP for that.

     •  Reply
  8. Inbox 4660
    goweeder  over 12 years ago

    “Where is this place? That doesn’t look like a medieval restaurant to me.”__________Just curious… how does a medieval restaurant look?

     •  Reply
  9. Spooky
    unca jim  over 12 years ago

    tigre1 said, “Did the Heimlich on a little bitty old lady "Good on you. Them lil’ birdy-ladies are tough to work on. You don’t want to break ‘em, just save ’em. Hard to gaugethe pressure.. An aside; a local ex-GB fire-volunteer EMS guy stabbed me about 5x in search of a vein, after me telling him ’where and how’ .. He told me that he was an ex-Nam-GB and knew what he was doing, so STF up. (prob; my MD’s mixup of BP meds) After I was carted home, we compared ranks and dates of service and my O-3 beat his E-3. by 8 years. I still buy him a beer once in a while. He’s still an arrogant oaf.

     •  Reply
  10. Walle avatar wave v1
    Dave Thorby  over 12 years ago

    He came up behind you and shouted “Alaka-Heimlich”? Wow!

     •  Reply
  11. But eo
    Rakkav  over 12 years ago

    It’s Id all right – as much as B.C.‘s world, it’s full of anachronisms. Id has always had such restaurants to my knowledge. It’s also had golf, the nightly news, and jokes about modern customs and technologies, mixed right in with fantastic dragons, magical impossibilities and never-changing petty officials, hair-covered Huns and cowardly knights. Is this your first visit to our noble kingdom?

     •  Reply
  12. Img 0004
    dfowensby  over 12 years ago

    heimlich maneuver has been disapproved by AHA and ARC for decades. different maneuver now, fewer broken ribs, punctured lungs and ruptured internal organs. and incorrectly using a nationally “outlawed” method like this can void the Good Samaritan exemption laws in this case in nearly every jurisdiction. noone teaches it, so you are immediately negligent in attempting to use it. with leniency, you might get manslaughter 2. Good Luck!

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    frrykid Premium Member over 12 years ago

    I wasn’t aware you could do the Heimlich without touching the person!

     •  Reply
  14. Emma on her wheel
    coffeemugman  over 12 years ago

    Nothing close to funny. On the show “Scrubs”, however, when Dr. Cox Heimlichs multiple people, same object (from one to the next, and the next…).

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Wizard of Id