Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for November 02, 2020

Life has given me all sorts of headaches. But at one time it DID give me Lemons! I had two Meyer Lemon trees in my back yard. After filling grocery bags full of lemons. Hanging the bags on the doors of all my neighbors for two blocks in every direction. I still had two whole shopping CARTS of lemons to squeeze and make gallons of juice! We burned out an electric juicer!!!!!

Aunty, if life never gave you lemons, how come you’re such a sourpuss?!

Life has given you things that last. Those lemons would have spoiled by now!

Love of alcohol runs in my family but I was spared that curse

The rest I got

The copious quantities of 5L box wine is the only reason you can tolerate yourself.

You’re a lemon carrier.

When you are faced with a dilemma make di-lemonade…

No lemonade for you.

Now that I think of it, life did kinda give us a lemon. The friends I live with (rent a room from) got a rescue puppy three years ago. The rescue group named her Lemon and her brother Potato. We were not sure if we would keep the name or not but never really put the effort into thinking of one. Lemon is a black lab mix dog who is very spoiled and happy.

Hey proofreader, the correct word is ’it’s’.

I’ve always had to buy my Lemon Juice, too.

I’m lazy, so I always buy the Juice pre-squeezed.

I live in a citrus orchard. Life gives me lemons and oranges.