Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 23, 2014

It’s not easy being green.

Zeeba Neighbah would be so happy. (Where would the police deport the crocodiles to, the Florida Everglades?)

Beware of crocs without docs.

@temple SUD – who do you think tipped off the cops?

It’s no fun being an illegal alien.

I’d rather the Crocs stay than Justin Bieber.

Blueskies, Ouch! Good point, though….Dark humor is as necessary as rain sometimes…..Good one…

The good old US of A – a nation founded by immigrants that is scared of new immigrants. Go figure!

If the crocs were smart (ha!) they’d be able to make a strong federal case here against the cops and the state. But, of course, the crocs are so dumb, they’ll probably willingly accept deportation even though native-born idiots….

Hi Bart,In fact, this is not funny at all. There are states that allow just what Pastis has written. Police can stop people and demand that they show they are here legally based solely on how they look or talk. We are a nation of immigrants. I know a vast number of people who have heavy foreign accents and some who barely speak English and all are here legally. This is a deeply discriminating and dangerous policy.

My brother, who attended Penn State at the time, once took a trip to Scotland with a student group. Per the Scots, the Penn State people had the least accent of any of the Americans they’d heard. Guess that meant they sounded the most like Scottish.

I think no accent in the west is really just a mish mash of accents from all over. It wouldn’t be weird to go to a state like Colorado and hear someone, in the same sentence, use a bit of a Texas drawl, southern twang with a hint of Minnesota and a spanish roll.

Other countries have secure borders. Why shouldn’t we? My dad was a Minuteman. He watched a lot of Arabs crossing the border. Who knows what some of them might have in mind? Another problem for us is over population. Leaving us with energy problems. As well as environmental issues. All from too many people. We hardly need more. Nothing to do with who they are.

Just off panel six is another cop and pig and rat are next. Show us you’re papers,kinda like pre WW2 Germany. No ‘N’ word.

…and don’t overlook Big Blue Phrogs!

I’m an Arizonan…and first, people not from here call our accent “The Arizona Clip” because it is quicker and shorter than other accents around the country. So, yes, we do have an accent, we just don’t realize it because we are so used to it.*Second, this is about the foolishness of immigration. Your average Sonoran Mexican is very poor. If I had the misfortune of being born there, I would run the border. Just before they put up that stupid fence, the government raised the prices on “Legality” cards, visas, work permits, etc. to $4 – 5,000. Where would a Mexican get that kind of money? And, to this day, there are Mexicans who cross the border in the morning, work all day, and cross it again in the evening to be with their families. They are considered valuable members of the community.*Unfortunately, the powers that be her in Zoni are very racist.

busted like a pair of cheap crocodile boots

He got in touch with his inner (and his outer) green.

Toledo-ese

No doubt you have seen write-ups on Bostonese, Brooklynese, Balmerese, and other regional speech quirks. I grew up in Toledo and the surrounding area and think that it deserves a pronunciation guide as well. I didn’t know I was talking “funny” until I met folks from other places who also talk funny (A friend from Texas says that the metal “tin” and the number 10 are the same: Both are “tin”). Not all of these are confined to the Toledo area, but whenever I travel back I am struck by how pervasive they are there.

Translation of Speech in Northern Ohio and Michigan Terms MeaningWINNERTIME The coldest season. “There’s a sale on fallen winner clothes”.THUNNERSTORM Plenny of rain, and loud booms.INNER NET A worldwide digital communications network. “I think twunny dollars a month is plenny to pay for the inner net”.TEMPACHER A measure of heat transfer on the Fahrenheit or Celsius scale.FEBYOOARY Winner’s month of coldest tempachers.GOLF A large sea area near land, or a wide gap. “The Golf of Mexico.”NOO “new”. An oddity, since “few” is not “foo”, “pew” not “poo”, etc. “I heard on the nooze we expect thunnerstorms up from the golf.”JOOLERY Adornments of precious metal, gem stones, and other materials.PAWLP The solid part of the fruit. Also there are light BAWLBs, etc.PEER Free of foreign substances. “Blessed are the peer of heart.”MERRY

A woman’s name.To wed. “We got merried last winner.”

BERRY

A man’s name. “That Berry Manilow has such a peer singing voice”To cover completely. “We berried poor old Ant Merry last Febyooary”.When preceded by “LI”, a reading collection, e.g. The Public Liberry.

MERE A looking glass.ASSESSORY A supplementary item. "Merry bought some assessories and joolery to go with her noo winner outfit.KEWPON “coupon”. However, “coup” is still pronounced “coo”. Also Grey Poupon is left unscathed (not “Pewpon”).WATT, WARE, WITCH, WETHER Like “what”, “where”, “which”, “whether”, but no breathed “wh” sound. In general, pronounce “wh” as a sounded “w”, e.g. “On a wim I wipped two egg wites wile wispering.”MELK A nourishing liqwood from cows. The state of ELLENOIS produces MELK.MERICLE A supernatural occurrence. Same syndrome as “melk”.KISSETTE A sound or video recording tape.EX-SPEARMINT The test of an idea or theory. The opposite deal from “melk”.RADDY-ATER Dissipates heat by radiation in a car or home.OTTO Car. “Berry took the Chevy to the otto repair for a noo raddy-ater and to fix the ottomatic transmission.”

Next they’ll kick chronic punsters out of the country….Pastis better watch out!

“No bum that can’t speak poifect English oughta stay in this country, he oughta be de-exported the hell outta here!” (Archie Bunker)

The police may not stop someone because they suspect them of being present in this country illegally. Only if they have cause to stop them for some other probable cause may they ask for proof of legal residence status. So that cop better be taking croc in for something else too.

Goodbye Croc!

xxx

In the last 20 or so years, accents, speech patterns, and constructions in the US have become much more like the upper midwest. I blame the Coen brothers and the flood of Australian actors with their chameleon-like ability to mimic every other English accent.

No Rat, they check status if, ans only if, the person commits an infraction or a crime. The issue isn’t immigration but ILLEGAL Immigration.

This near real life thing is sad. why hate, why can’t people get over race differince?

bwsides, the people here without papers are more correctly, undocumented workers.A frriend’s friend worked all day in a meat processing plant. he cleaned offal,“entrails” off the cold locker floor. do you feel that he was stealing a job? and most of them pay into medicare and SS even tho they will never get benefits.

Actually we do have the American Crocodile which are native in North America including small parts of the USA.

It is much harder for people from countries overseas to sneak into the U.S. than it is for people from Mexico.

I don’t understand it; what is the joke here? ___________________________________The joke is that the croc, although a citizen, is being arrested because he has a different skin color (green) and talks funny “I ees…” etc.

If they’re not here legally then they are invaders.

Bye.

Arizona passed a law a couple years ago that regular police officers could enforce federal immigration law, and could ask anyone they deemed suspicious to show papers. That means that at least two of my children, and perhaps all four, could be pulled over in Arizona because they look like their thrid-generation Latino dad. I doubt they are pulling over undocumented Brits, French, or Canadians (and I’ve known all of those); and not likely undocumented Japanese, Chinese, Korean, or Southeast Asians.

We can only hope.

More likely old events. Pastis does a ton of strips at once and it takes a while for them to actually reach the public. So he can draw a strip that focuses on something in the news at the time he draws it and it may be a couple months before we read them, at which point they seem like a late reaction to events already over with. I think it’s either The Crass Menagerie or Pearls Sells Out that he explains this.

Republican agenda and thoughts

Zebra was sus…in Among us.

That’s so Croc-ist