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Luann by Greg Evans and Karen Evans for April 27, 2014
Transcript:
Dad: "Oh, good. You got the "maximum relief" Aspirin. I'm tired of the "minimum relief" stuff. Eye drops for "sensitive eyes"? Aren't all eyes sensitive?" Dad: "What's this? Provides liquid hydration!" Well. That's gotta be better than solid hydration. Ah! Healthy Nutrition" and "Wholesome goodness." Two of my favorite meaningless phrases!" Dad: "Uh-oh. You got "ultra soothing" shave creme. I really don't need to be soothed more than just "super." Wait..."super" is less than "ultra" right? Or is it more than "extra" but less than "plus"?" Mom: "Do you want to do the shopping from now on?" Dad: "No. I just like to provide the post shopping commentary. "Kills bugs dead!" Okaaay..."
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âShoes repaired, while you waitâ⊠as if I have any other choice? â â4 out of 5 Doctors recommend âDarnitolâ "⊠that 5th doctor is just jealous⊠- The sign says: âSorry, weâre closed. Come back again!â⊠Yeah? Well⊠if you were really sorry, then why do you keep doing it, every day? And instead of coming back, I think Iâll just camp out until you open up, againâŠ. -âThe best product money can buy!â⊠OH!⊠So thatâs why they look at me funny, when I try to give them buttonsâŠ. â â55 Billion served!ââŠ. That must have been some day for those workers! Boy, Iâm glad I waited till now to go there!âŠ
reedkomicks Premium Member almost 11 years ago
Levi, if youâre out there, can you explain yesterdayâs comic? Did they ever say they were going out to dinner before the prom? Doesnât this seem like a sudden idea introduced by Delta?
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Do studies show that it works better than âDarnitolâ? Cos I think I was late for class, that dayâŠ.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
True. That does happen some, tooâŠ.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Or the 5 minute news feature in betweenâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âRe duh ndantââWatching My Figure (Of Speech)âorâIâm Just Ad About Youâ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Another one: âYouâll be completely satisfied, or your money back!â If itâs for ingestion, do they need to see the parts that I ate, to prove that I wasnât satisfied? â Or if itâs for a flashlight, will they check to see if the light was pleasing to me, in their own little test?
noahproblem almost 11 years ago
Just donât tell him you used a PIN number to get money from the ATM machine â his head might explodeâŠ
blunebottle almost 11 years ago
Frankâs main form of entertainment.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Or the local news station that says itâs âAction Newsâ⊠they mustâve beaten the other stations.. now the rest can only show the " Inactive News"⊠â Or âEyewitness Newsâ⊠were they all just standing around, and then boom â they just conveniently saw all this stuff happening all over?â And every TV network says that theyâre the #1 network in this thing or the other⊠âAmericaâs Most WatchedââŠâAmericaâs New #1â⊠Iâm just going to check the ratings and see for myselfâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
And, new âPermanent Strength Enditolâ ^LOL! I think Iâd rather just have the âTemporary Strength" one⊠maybe save some âStrengthâ for the headache I plan to have, laterâŠ.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
LOL!!!! â Jessica Simpson is still available, if they need a spokespersonâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âSugar Freeâ
Thatâs a âhalf-truthâ. It may not have any sugar in it, but it sure ainât free!
Manhunter808 almost 11 years ago
Manhunter808 almost 11 years ago
Or a TV episode that is âall newâ? How many are only partially new?
watmiwori almost 11 years ago
Has any manufacturer ever marketed any product that wasnât âNewâ and âImprovedâ?
âNewâ packaging usually means itâs harder to open,and results in even more non-biodegradable trashthan before.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
And now, weâre getting ready to get that rain! -Wow, full day! But no better way than with the kids and the Mrs! Better than a âhalf-dayâ with anyone else! â Was it with John Crawford? I was glad that they reunited a few years backâŠ. I just learned that she auditioned for Princess Leia in the original Star Wars trilogyâŠ. and I didnât even realize that she had a bit role in TJ Hooker, and a few other shows! â My favorite Berlin song is âMetroâ⊠followed by âNo More WordsââŠ
watmiwori almost 11 years ago
Or, if youâre French, a Balbastre.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âYour other choice is to leave your shoes and they will call you when they are ready.â^Yes, but youâre still waiting , either way⊠-" I would just like to know how McDonaldâs made that count."^They actually had a story about that a while back, but I donât remember where I came across that. â Incidentally, I caught a special off of âFood Networkâ, that shows the different McDâs across the country and across the globe. I found out that some of them actually have a different restaurant theme⊠some of them (even in the US) actually are diners, with baked chicken diners, meatloaf and potatoes kind of fare (though you can still order the Big Mac, etc)âŠ. In Italy, they also serve gelatos, and other cuisines in their McDs⊠actually, quite a few had some very interesting features locally and abroad.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Actually, also better than a full day with anyone else!
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âLast year, it was The Gin Blossoms.â ^Did you hear it from a ârumor in the schoolyardâ?⊠Heh, hehâŠ.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Ha ha!!
wiselad almost 11 years ago
new packages, 2 reasons, to make them different than previous and easier to ârotate by expiration dateâ and many times, new package is actually smaller, before the 1 dollar juice was 60 Ounces, new package is now 56 ounces
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Precious, indeed! You can hardly get better than that!
Sisyphos almost 11 years ago
Frank! Havenât you learned anything after all these years of marriage to Nancy?! You are cruisinâ for a bruisinâ, brother!
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
And they were practically a âmobile homeââŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
One more: Dish detergent with âActive Sudsâ. Iâm never going back to the brand with the âLazyâ ones, ever again!
dadoctah almost 11 years ago
Is the relation between âSuper Soothingâ and âUltra Soothingâ for shave creme the same as between âSuper Holdâ and âUltra Holdâ for styling gel? And where does âMegaâ fit into the scheme?
barbarasbrute almost 11 years ago
Thank goodness Iâm not married to him.
nailer Premium Member almost 11 years ago
Near my home there is an sign in a house that reads in Spanish, to the effect of âHOME-VISITING PLUMBERSâ Really? IsnÂŽt that convenient or what?
Contessa Carrington almost 11 years ago
Reminds me of the movie âSend Me No Flowersâ. Hudson play a hypochondriac, the opening scene is priceless.
rshive almost 11 years ago
And my favorite âMade with real cheese.â As opposed to unreal cheese.
Mordock999 Premium Member almost 11 years ago
Frank?
SHUT-UP!!!
Boots at the Boar Premium Member almost 11 years ago
This is what I do when watching TV. Nobody likes my running commentary during the commercials, but at least I keep my mouth shut during the program.
iluvsatch almost 11 years ago
Yes, itâs called frozen.
jonnijones almost 11 years ago
Aah, you must live in Northern California. Nice.
locake almost 11 years ago
A lot of times the new package will be designed to look like the old package, but hold less product. Like an ice cream carton with a concave bottom.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âIt means you are free to do something else while you wait.â^Yes, youâre free to do other stuff, yes.. BUT âŠ. youâre still waiting for your shoes to be completed âŠ. it doesnât matter if youâre waiting in person, or occupying your time by doing something else⊠the shoes, themselves , are still having to be completed. waiting doesnât always mean standing there and looking, it can also mean âexpecting the work on it to be completed, sometimes in a certain amount of timeâ ⊠same way you drop off your car and go to work, or order something in the mail, and have it arrive after a few days⊠even while youâre doing other things, youâre still waiting for said package to arrive, or for the car to come out of the shopâŠâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âBecause of Blu Ray they are getting some of those extras nowâ^True⊠but Blu Rays have usually had extra stuff all along. In fact, they have usually had stuff even the DVDs never had, even in itâs heyday⊠â And no, not all DVDs come with extras, but the point of what I was saying is that there is now a drop off in even the larger companies and bigger productions not putting extras on DVDs anymore⊠DVD sales are steady, but they donât rely on those sales like they used toâŠ.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âNow, can you explain how they make âimitation seafood saladâ?â^I donât know if you were serious about this, but I actually can . Imitation crab meat is chock full of⊠Tapioca. Yes, they put some tapioca and other assorted fish pieces in it⊠which kind of fish varies by brandâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Gives new meaning to âFarm Aidâ ! â Now we just need John Cougar/John Cougar Mellencamp/John Mellencamp to write a song or two for it!
cmbrach1999 almost 11 years ago
I canât stand the Sunday strips for Luann. Every other strip that I read they are fine. Luann is the worst.
ACTIVIST1234 almost 11 years ago
NOTE TO EVERYBODY: Letâs keep Torad in our thoughts through Wed. Heâs finishing up his credentialing exams Tu-Wed. so wonât be checking in here. May Luannâs fans go to bat for him, sending karma his way!
Not the Smartest Man On the Planet -- Maybe Close Premium Member almost 11 years ago
This is me at the store.
Fan oâ Lio. almost 11 years ago
Andy Rooney lives on.
Sangelia almost 11 years ago
My ex was, âWhy did you buy all of that?â It was food for a week. To him I was supposed to feed two folks on $20 a week. Including food for lunch.Learned how to stretch the food budget. Dude hated to contribute to the food budget back then. He was the type to mooch off of folks. Iâm wondering if he still does.
boldyuma almost 11 years ago
Richard Pryor used to do a routine where he talked about under arm deodorant spray..He said âNope..Iâm not using any of that..Have you read the warning on the label..Contents may explode?..I donât want anything on my body that may explode.â
TiffWHO almost 11 years ago
Frank is on a roll & Nancy needs to kick his butt-er!
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âhow the heck does one imitate seafood?â^VERY carefully. And make sure no fishermen are standing around, when you do it!
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
ââŠon the sidewalkâŠ!â ^Lol! True! Or if itâs BREAKING NEWS! âŠ. if they announce it past the first half hour, itâs pretty much⊠wait, scratch thatâŠ. I guess by then it is a broken record!âŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Continuing on the subject of âimitation seafoodâ:
-ââŠ..or maybe itâs the other way around, and whatever seafood it was, was good at doing impressions!â
Caldonia almost 11 years ago
According to all comic strips, marriage is irritating.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Or how about some oxymoronic products or services: âhot chili, jumbo shrimp, virtual reality, original copy, exact estimateâ?
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âAnd if itâs âbreaking news,â will they do something to âfix itâ?â ^LOL!!! Yeah, thatâs the biggest thing! Instead of just standing around and telling everyoneâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Me: And furthermore, if itâs â24 hour protectionâ, do I get a refund if I donât get the full 24? Or why donât they have a timer to let you know how much is left (much like the TV show)?^
JPW "They protect themselves from that by saying that âyour results may varyâŠâ^Me: Yeah, true! I Meant to specify â24 hour deodorantsâ!
cdgar almost 11 years ago
I like being a pain in the azz too, just like Frank.
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
Yeah, the Hoests basically said that âthe Lockhornsâ are supposed to be two people who enjoy âstrugglingâ with each other, and they said that itâs meant to be two people not âin loveâ with each other, despite the âspinâ that the syndicate and others tried to put on it. - The Hoests regarded the papers and the syndicateâs trying to put a positive spin on the Lockhorns as a way to sell papers, by telling people that âthey love each other in the endâ, and the Hoests said that itâs definitely not the case.
Ulmanor almost 11 years ago
This reminds me of the Calvin and Hobbes dad at the grocery store.http://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1995/09/21
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
GrrrrâŠI wouldnât go shopping the next time, NancyâŠlet Frank stew and waste hours in the store all by himself! ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
Re: the old â74 Dodge Tradesman 200 vanâŠquick! Resurrect it from wherever it landed and send it over to the 2 sad couples! At least theyâll have some âatmosphereâ rather than the stinky interior of an even stinkier bus! ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
Oh, LOVELY!!! ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
I like roses when theyâre variegatedâŠthis one is particularly lovely! ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
They would make a Great corsage, especially if the girlâs dress is one of the colors! ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
Pretty! Iâll bet that âblack spotâ wouldnât Dare find a home on your roses!âŠalas, Iâve been battling it for two years now on my French Lace Floribunda. The only way I can encourage leaf growth is by nipping the budsâŠwhich I Hate doing as the flowers are so beautiful. I was able to spray them early this year, so hereâs hoping. Perhaps Quill should have gotten Luann a corsage of French Lace roses⊠;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
All I can say is Wow! All of your beautiful roses except 6 came from various cuttings!!! I Really am impressed! Luann would have been tooâŠwell Should have! She is not exactly a âRose Person.â Actually, I am not sure Luann even likes flowers. Seems she is usually thinking about boys, and maybe her friends and Puddles, of courseâŠbut, I donât think there is anything else we really know about herâŠexcept she wanted to go to drama camp, and seems to be interested in drama itself⊠Can anyone else think of something that she likes? (Besides Quill). Just curious! ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
Thanks for the info on black spot! I am thinking one of my problems has been that I havenât been spraying the underneath of the leaves! I just started doing that a couple of weeks ago for the first time. I usually keep a strict two-week schedule of spraying. I never thought about spraying the canes themselves! Yes, I always water my roses in the soil around them, so thatâs good. I have to keep telling my husband Not to put the sprinkler where the water will hit the tops of my roses! These are Great suggestions, Brdshtt!!! Thank You!!! (And, if Luann was the least bit interested in roses, sheâd probably thank you too!). ;)
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
The day is gently endingâŠâseeâ yâall later⊠;)
greenlynn Premium Member almost 11 years ago
I am sure glad they donât make me pay for all those âfree giftsâ (except for the fact that they are begging a donation).
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
I appreciate âPeppermint Twistsâ, but my vote would be for âPurple Tigerâ variety!
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
âThe Lockhorns still go places together and eat dinner together. For a couple that hates each other they still spend a lot of time together. "^Bunny Hoest said, herself , that itâs all âperfunctoryâ. She said that others have tried to âpaint a more positive spinâ, but that the Lockhorns were definitely carrying out their literal last name, and that they were meant to be portrayed as âenjoying getting on each otherâs nervesââŠ..
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
And the difference between the Lockhorns and the Bundys is that at the end of the day, the Bundys realize that they are âstuck with each otherâ, and yet try to make the best of it. The Lockhorns realize they are âstuck togetherâ and âthy to make the worst of itâ!- That, and the Bundys do at least say "I love youâ to each other at the endâŠ
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
No, you took some very fine pics, there! â But I know what you mean.. cameras can produce some fine images, but it still wonât match the God given naked eye for enjoying such beautiesâŠ..the delicate leaves, the natural light⊠nothing like the rewarding experience of seeing itâs cultivation close up⊠I am sure that you are enjoying a rewarding experience in seeing their progress!
ORMouseworks almost 11 years ago
Thanks for the prop hints, Brdshtt! About the only roses I was into at 18 were the miniature ones that could be bought in a super-store⊠They made a quick and sure present for my mother as she loved red miniatures⊠Now that I am not living in an apartment, I prefer roses in the ground⊠;)
JayBluE almost 11 years ago
No, I mean write a song for this new series. â But Iâm sure âRain On The Scarecrowâ, etc. was also big for âFarm AidââŠ.
Lamberger almost 11 years ago
No matter the apparent incompatibility, the fate of Frank and Nancyâs marriage is solely in the hands of one person: Greg Evans
AngelMarieSings almost 11 years ago
When it kills them alive, then you worryâŠ.
Authentic Tommi almost 3 years ago
But did she get the right bread?