Wizard of Id by Parker and Hart for April 23, 2015

A compliment is a powerful tool

I had a boss who would use the exact opposite tactic on me. If I had trouble with a project, he would say, “It’s OK; I understand if you CAN’T do it.” My contrary nature would kick into overdrive at those words, and I always managed to get it done. I KNEW it was blatant manipulation…but couldn’t help myself.

You would think that the Wiz would have figured out by now that the best way to get out of household chores is to do them badly.

I learned if I ask a bunch of questions, she’ll finally say … Nevermind, I’ll just do it myself.

Some wizard.Merlin got the dishes done with some prestidigitolium!

I’m surprised the Wiz doesn’t have a KitchenAid…

When my wife complained about all the snow on the driveway, and wondered if I was ever going to shovel, I bought her a snow thrower…

A now disgraced comedian once said that if you do the job so badly you’ll never be asked to do it again.

I didn’t mind washing dishes. I couldn’t cook worth a darn. Wife, on the other hand, was a marvelous cook.Least I could do was the washing up..

I learned long ago from an old GF that if you do the job just a little off ,they will never ask you to do again ! hahahha

The correct reply is, " Then I don’t need any more practice."

I usually wind up doing the dishes. My wife usually does the cooking.