Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for June 15, 2015
Transcript:
Pig: Guard duck! You've been gone forever! Where have you been? Guard duck: I've retired from the military and moved to the woods. Now I'm writing a scholarly treatise on my time in the service. Pig: Sounds important. Can I see what you have so far? Guard Duck: Of course. I blew $#!# up. Guard Duck: The rest will be filler.
BE THIS GUY over 9 years ago
A duck of action, not words.
Sherlock Watson over 9 years ago
The back cover has some quotes from critics::“Blowed up good!” — Big Jim McBob“Blowed up REAL good!” — Billy Sol Hurok
Templo S.U.D. over 9 years ago
What, no comic censor man?
knight1192a over 9 years ago
Well, at least Guard Duck is kinda back. Maybe he’ll be called back to active duty. One can only hope.
AGED_ENGINEER Premium Member over 9 years ago
The Uniquacker?
JusSayin over 9 years ago
I can not tell if Little Guard Duck …. Has a neck beard… …. Or is Amish. I would prefer he be Amish than a hipster.
phylum over 9 years ago
oh yeah…well you missed duckkk….and guess what……your going to need a bigger bomb….
oldschool434 over 9 years ago
with anduck is filler the same as stuffing?
Nighthawk700 over 9 years ago
Just about every male I’ve known who retired from the military immediately started with a beard. They didn’t all keep them, but they at least grew them for a while.
comicsnerd74 over 9 years ago
What the hell? Guard duck with a lot of facial hair, and not just an average beard?
Sisyphos over 9 years ago
I like Guard Duck’s way of thinking. Very honest and to the point.Is he now becoming a reclusive Survivalist?
rshive over 9 years ago
Well, he got the main part right.
NeedaChuckle Premium Member over 9 years ago
But the beard has to be trimmed to fit the emergency breathing masks, in case of fire.
Mikel V over 9 years ago
With that beard, Guard Duck resembles the late Richard Attenborough
jerrythemacguy over 9 years ago
The last violent guy to retire to the woods and write a scholarly treatise was the “Unabomber”.
Is Guard Duck gonna take out “Duck Dynasty”?
Vet Premium Member over 9 years ago
Fondly I remember the explosions, the tracers, the sounds of bullets whizzing past my ears, the screaming of the Sarge trying to direct fire at a mass of trees and bushes, the whoosh of the F-4 as he went over at Mach 1000, the smell of napalm, the privacy of field bathing, dry shaving, the ripe smell of 30 or so men huddling together, ahhhhhh those were the days.Yes, I am in the FBI files.
ChessPirate over 9 years ago
The dedication is to Edgar K. B.(KaBoom!) Montrose…
grampianlothian over 9 years ago
Now GD is back I hope to see his friend Snuffles the Cat as well. Now who would do such a thing as bringing HIM back?
AtariDragon over 9 years ago
Is that supposed to be a beard, or an Elizabethan ruffled collar? I thought it was supposed to indicate he now thought he was Shakespeare.
trkeller99 over 9 years ago
Guard Duck is back, there is a god
Number Three over 9 years ago
Always start small.
xxx
abbybookcase over 9 years ago
guard duck is into that backwoods no shaving thing. perhaps a little trim could give him an abe lincoln look. it would add so much gravitas to his persona.
drdougsteward over 9 years ago
The minimalist complete guide to losing weight and healthy living. Chapter one. Eat Less. Chapter two. Exercise More. The end. Everything else is just filler.
Uskoke over 9 years ago
He failed the physical.The doctor was a quack.
alextheparrot over 9 years ago
I haven’t seen Guard Duck in this strip for a while.
alextheparrot over 9 years ago
I haven’t seen Guard Duck in this strip for a while.
alextheparrot over 9 years ago
Sorry I commented twice. That was a mistake.
MidnightHunter over 9 years ago
my explosive temper!!watch out!!!!!when my sister and i fight, it’s not long. either she whines to mom at 13 yrs old, or i sulk on the floor after she throws me over her shoulder.they don’t last long.
Piksea Premium Member over 9 years ago
Is that a Shakespearean ruff he’s got on his neck?
claire de la lune. over 9 years ago
That beard looks odd; is that only me?