Pickles by Brian Crane for June 22, 2015

Earl, you nit-wit. Why didn’t you want to part with that shirt?

You should of cut it up for rags Opal.

I see Earl’s getting his own back. ’Bout time!

Good. Earl made his point. “Throw your stuff out if you want, but leave my stuff alone.”

Sometimes we really like a certain shirt…

SHE’s one to talk! A polka-dot shirt with striped shorts? Get dressed in the dark this morning, Opal?

But besides all that, it’s perfect!

Your plan deserved to be foiled in that manner, Opal. If you want to toss anything in the garbage, go look through your own drawers and closets.

Earl should toss something of Opal’s and make sure she sees it in the trash can.

Let your imagination supply the dialogue for that conversation.

Cue the people with the butterfly nets. You’re on in five.

She could have at least donated it, why throw away a perfectly good shirt?

ding ding ding! We have a winner!

Why is it that women delight in getting rid of their man’s possessions – particularly clothes ? And why is it that most guys hate to throw away a perfectly good, 20 year old shirt, that only has a couple of holes, a stain you’d hardly notice, and still fits ( albeit a bit snugly ) ?

You have to put them in the trash – then put more trash over the top of them. It’s what I do.

Earl, love you man. Don’t gave in.

The holes are in the front, the stains are on the outside. Inside out and backwards it looks fine.

I LIKE that shirt.

I swear Brian Crane must know my husband. Earl is far too much like him.

There has been many times I’ve put my top on the wrong way round.xxx

i always wind up with stains. anybody want my dry cleaning bill? the cleaner is very nice……

Linguist: If it doesn’t have four holes in it, it will be difficult to put on.

Throw your own stuff out, not someone elses stuff…

Roscoe must be from the south. Note that he said “trifecta” instead of “hat trick.”

I always wore a white t-shirt at work. Right way round in the morning, then after I’d dropped lunch all over it, turned it round for a clean canvas in the afternoon!