F Minus by Tony Carrillo for September 21, 2015

“Which, I might add, I listed also in the ‘special skills’ section!”

He was the number one candidate for the job but nobody could understand him.

Always mention being nominated for a Nobel Prize: the process is secret and they never release those names.

I knew a guy who wrote on his resume that he was chosen as Time magazine’s person of the year for 2006.

Job interviews, the act of selling yourself not by being honest but by trying to guess what they want to hear and telling them that.

At least for me, every time I’m honest I NEVER get hired anywhere.

One time I was applying for a job I didn’t actually want and there was a question asking if I could speak any other languages and I put down “Huttese” (a Star Wars language, for any who don’t know) and, hey, I didn’t get the job. ;) I had to apply for jobs because my mom was pressuring me to.

I’d say that the fellow applying might be really brilliant. If his invented languages had tenses, syntax and modes, they took a tremendous amount of thought. Would he be willing to exert that kind of effort on things useful to the company, he might be worth hiring.

Unemployed nerd: “I’m applying for a job.”Employer: “Do you know any other other languages?”Unemployed nerd: “Well, I’m fluent in Klingon. I also know Gobbledegook (the language of goblins, of course), the Urgal language, and Sindarin.”Employer: “Uh…”