Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for May 03, 2016

Earl looks perfectly comfortable.

That’s what my mother would say to me, when I complained that a friend was mad at me.Therapy helped………………

Earl didn’t do it, Nancy is on a tear again. Earl yelled “Get off my damn lawn” at her and she got him good.Don’t mess with Nancy.All her husband said was, “when in the Sam Hill am I gonna get supper?”

That’ll happen when you turn from weighty matters to light entertainment.

He should have been doing nothing. Chairs are for sleeping.

You know, when you get very old, gravity starts working against you.

I’ll say he did. He tried to squeeze a ninth letter into 14 down on the Ballard Street Gazette Crossword puzzle. Clue: “Susan’s last name” He tried to write “Underhill.” The weight of the extra ink tipped him over.

He fall down and go “boom” !

Yeah, I think most of you realise that Earl has never been one to take advice or instruction.

Whether it’s about tightening loose screws, or loosening up in motion class…. or even following the directions on a can of soup….Earl resents authority, makes his own path…. and then gets even more resentful when “Earl’s Way” doesn’t work out right….

Liverlips… you might be right….and if you think he’s bad about forcing extra letters into the crossword puzzle…you should just see him put together a jigsaw puzzle…with a hammer.

He’s barred for life from the Puzzle Corner at the Ballard Street Saw Sharpening Shop and Senior Center, after he ignored the posted signs requiring the secure holstering of all mallets, hammers and saws.

Hmmmm… U-N-D-E-R-H-I-L-L…..That doesn’t bear any resemblance to my last name.Well, they both have “U-N” in them, I suppose….

Bev! So you liked the compromise that I helped work out for the Cherry Street roundabout?I originally suggested 22 and 7/8ths mph, which the Street Sign Committee accepted….but the City Council voted that it was just a bit too slow.

I myself keep to my original proposed speed though…It’s safer, don’t you think?

Something really stupid from the looks of it.

I wish every day was Saturday.

WHO ORDERED THE NEW CHAIR ?

Earl just needs a more stable chair.One with four legs, not those fancy tube things.A couple of aerodynamic fins on the back shuld help on breezy days.

He was taken aback…

Prepare to launch!

Its a sitting chair not a rocking chair…….