Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for August 30, 2016
August 29, 2016
August 31, 2016
Transcript:
super bowl special man: gosh i hate football, don't you? let's see what else is on? click tv: next on antique road rage watch as a panel of short-fused, irritable appraisers erupt in a frenzy of violence when confronted by greedy nobodies bearing broken, dirty personal effects- man: no. click tv: welcome to chinwag! where we'll address the issues of the day! more issues than anywhere else! social security! liberals! tainted meat! puppy mills! think of any issue and we're all over it like ugly on an ape- man: no. click tv: today on blue-in-the-face we'll grab the issues by the lapels and shake them silly! hard issues nobody else will touch, like how can orrin hatch's head get an unrestricted blood flow with those stiff collars he wears- man: no. click tv: on open mike slapfest our panel of heavyweight insiders is pumped for some extreme action! they'll get those issues in a choke hold! a suplex! a scissor hold! a kidney-klutch- man: no. click tv: it's a prattle royale today on prattlemania! no issue will leave this building alive! their own mamas won't recognize these issues without their dental records- man: gah. click tv: on "mystery!" we present a new cozy english who-done-it, inspector brit in murder by anglophilia. dear miss dorkin's head has been sheared clean off her torso by some sort of gardening implement. i've just found it in the bed of aspidistras. how ghastly! man: ah.
Sisyphos over 8 years ago
Thank goodness for PBS Masterpiece Mysteries.Or, maybe I will watch the Super Bowl. Except after 49 years of Roman numerals, the Biggest and Brightest Wigs decided they must go to Arabic numerals in 2016 for “Super Bowl 50,” because, who knows what the L L means? But next year, it will be back to “LI.” I do favor Tradition….
Kip W over 8 years ago
Clahss!
grainpaw over 8 years ago
Very likely I will make good use of my time by brewing five gallons of beer, something I have control over.In any sporting event, it is already known that one team will win. I don’t care which, and my watching or not will not influence the outcome. But If I don’t make beer, I will be negatively influenced for weeks. Therefore, I actively brew instead of passively watch. Then everything goes better for me with a good homebrew or two waiting for me at the end of the day. I am not cast into a month-long depression if “my” team loses.
Teto85 Premium Member over 8 years ago
Nothing like a good English murder mystery. Even the bad ones are good.