Close to Home by John McPherson for October 18, 2016

Aliens wear v-neck t-shirts?

Umm, when you see someone being abducted, that’s evidence of a crime, so no waiting period….

But good luck proving your claim!

This reinforces the falsehood that you gotta wait 24 hours before reporting someone missing. If you have concerns about someone missing, you should immediately talk to the police

This is a lot easier than the divorce you were planning to ask for.

It’s only a crime if it is unwanted behavior.

Actually, just some friends helping him escape.

Tell’em his personal space has been violated. The federal government will quickly come to his rescue. But don’t mention he’s a man. Call him your zaulmate.

Clearly she does not want him back.

Bye and goodluck honey

There is no waiting period. Many shows and movies have publicized the 24 or 48 hour waiting period to report missing people, but that doesn’t exist in real police offices. If the police find a missing adult whose actions were voluntary, they might not disclose where the person is unless the person gives permission. Filing a missing person report for an adult doesn’t entitle you to know where they are, only that they are safe.This particular indecent doesn’t really appear to be voluntary.

“in the mean time, while they’re probing you, ask them to check your prostate…”

In my are 24 hours is when someone is just missing, nobody knows where they went. It is because often times people get upset and go for a drive or leave for awhile then they come back. It doesn’t mean they were kidnapped.

If anyone see’s a crime or knows it happened then there is no waiting period for kidnapping. There is a difference between unknown what happened and we know they got stolen.

And that is why alien abductions are so rarely solved!