Monty by Jim Meddick for December 06, 2016

It always does.

Monty, first you need to anessth … er anethsetize — DANG IT! I can’t spell that word.

First you have to knock your cat out.

Real men don’t shave their pussies do they?

Nair. That’s all I’m sayin’….

Leave Dear Fleshy alone. I like the way he looks.

You’re supposed to wrap the cat in a towel first to immobilize him. But even that can be a struggle. I once tried trimming a matted long-hair with scissors, and she just sat there; very calm. Even when I missed and sliced some skin, she took it— I didn’t even notice at first. Finally had to send her to a pro.

If only we could talk to them.

Oh, wait, we can talk to them!

If only they’d listen.

Fans, please email letter@globe.com and tell the Boston Globe to reinstate Monty, which they have cancelled as on Monday! They’ve been forced to change course before on these decisions…make yourselves heard.

Shouda used an electric!

You might get the president-elect to hold Fleshy for you.

On the bright side, Monty still has his nose and some of his hair….