Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for October 28, 2017

Hey Buddie, you only have ten items there. Go to another line and don’t waste my time!

“And the eggs BETTER all be in that carton!”

I’ve heard of a hard sell, but this is ridiculous.

There you go; you chose the wrong line again!

Or else he’ll get fired for misbehaving with a customer.

Prices are getting so bad that soon the sign will say

12 ITEMS OR LEASE

or fewer

He went to the mirror dept…to check himself out.

Man, that is one tough looking cashier. You’d have to be desperate to use him.

One of our supermarkets has “approximately” 12 items – they know people can’t count.

Quite often, it’s faster not to use the express lane. A fair part of the checkout is the bagging and change making.

Or else what?

In my early retirement days, I’d have to drive down to Lakeland to ‘escort’ Ma thru her shopping tours for groceries and ‘elderly crap’.. and naturally, at checkout time, she’d find an eleven-cent error in the scanner total/difference and “her math” which required a manager’s attendance, which took time, which tested the patience of me, and everyone in Central Florida, but by gawd, she’d be correct and then stand in line at the ‘service desk’ just to get her eleven cents back. Those were they days when ‘scanners’, UPC’s and slack-jawed grocery-stackers had NFI what they were doing. Come to thinka it, Ma died poor, but certainly not broke.

He looks like Bert from Sesame Street

Instead of saying “Did you find everything you were looking for?” He asks “Did you get everything you had coming to you?”