This is sort of what Lucy did in the song A Book Report on Peter Rabbit from “You’re a Good Man Charlie Brown”. Lucy counts her words throughout the song and adds a couple of "very"s in her last sentence and adds a “The End” to get the number of words to 100. I can relate to Lucy. I remember writing like that when I was in Grade 2.
Lizzie, not so much. It’s pretty brazen to make the essay be only one sentence and to use “very” as many times as Elizabeth does. A kid might do that to be funny; but Elizabeth comes off here as more of an antagonist. She turns away from her father with her eyes closed and declares she has met the teacher’s sole requirement for the essay.
She is practically saying to her father, “I am planning to create a scene with my teacher tomorrow, unless you stop me.” If John has any sense, he will try to find out what has gone wrong between Lizzie and her teacher.
" William Allen White’s visit here, en route to the Philippines, recalled the story of the famous Kansas editor and publisher’s meeting several years ago with a group of fledgling newspaper men in Lawrence. Kas. The “cubs” listened eagerly to everything “the Sage of Emporia” had to say and besought him to give them some advice about news writing.
“I never give advice,” said Mr. White, “but there is one thing I wish you would do when you sit down to write news stories, and that is: Never use the word, ‘very.’ It is the weakest word in the English language; doesn’t mean anything. If you feel the urge of ‘very’ coming on, just write the word, ‘damn,’ in the place of ‘very.’ The editor will strike out the word, ‘damn,’ and you will have a good sentence.”
Writing to word count requires a real effort at conciseness and that requires the ability to condense word choices to manageable but cogent levels. One of the most difficult phases of the writing progress: how to get the message across in the most comprehensible way without losing its potency.
As some guy said: if it was easy, anybody could do it
A funny book I had was called Singlets, written by a comedian named Rich Hall. It was about “words that are not in the dictionary, but should be.” Some words included:
Essoasso: One who swerves through a service station to avoid a red light.
Hamburgacide: When a beef patty cannot stand being grilled any more and sacrifices itself by falling through the grill onto the hot coals or propane.
Rumphump: The place above the wheel on a school bus that rises into the foot area of your seat.
Schwee: The sound made when a door opens on Star Trek.
Scotchrotor: The wheel left behind when you have exhausted all your tape.
Terma Helper: The extra verbiage one uses to stretch a 600-word essay to the required 1,000.
A teacher told the class to write a page about anything they wanted to. My friend filled the page with “huh huh huh…”. He did not get a good grade, nor would she let him give it another try.
Writing is hard to do unless you have something to write about. I lost interest in writing early on, because (1) Does not pay well (2) and if you do have a winner, dozens of others will pop out of the woodwork claiming you stole their idea! (My only claim to fame is in TRAINS Magazine Nov. 2009 p.56 – Father and son Quincy, Ill to Buffalo, NY on a Drovers Pass. CB&Q IHB and NYC)
Templo S.U.D. almost 7 years ago
touché, Elizabeth
Lee Cox almost 7 years ago
It’s actually funny the way she argues the technicality, considering what she’ll do for a living when she’s grown up!
howtheduck almost 7 years ago
This is sort of what Lucy did in the song A Book Report on Peter Rabbit from “You’re a Good Man Charlie Brown”. Lucy counts her words throughout the song and adds a couple of "very"s in her last sentence and adds a “The End” to get the number of words to 100. I can relate to Lucy. I remember writing like that when I was in Grade 2.
Lizzie, not so much. It’s pretty brazen to make the essay be only one sentence and to use “very” as many times as Elizabeth does. A kid might do that to be funny; but Elizabeth comes off here as more of an antagonist. She turns away from her father with her eyes closed and declares she has met the teacher’s sole requirement for the essay.
She is practically saying to her father, “I am planning to create a scene with my teacher tomorrow, unless you stop me.” If John has any sense, he will try to find out what has gone wrong between Lizzie and her teacher.
HeckleMeElmo almost 7 years ago
" William Allen White’s visit here, en route to the Philippines, recalled the story of the famous Kansas editor and publisher’s meeting several years ago with a group of fledgling newspaper men in Lawrence. Kas. The “cubs” listened eagerly to everything “the Sage of Emporia” had to say and besought him to give them some advice about news writing.
“I never give advice,” said Mr. White, “but there is one thing I wish you would do when you sit down to write news stories, and that is: Never use the word, ‘very.’ It is the weakest word in the English language; doesn’t mean anything. If you feel the urge of ‘very’ coming on, just write the word, ‘damn,’ in the place of ‘very.’ The editor will strike out the word, ‘damn,’ and you will have a good sentence.”jpayne4040 almost 7 years ago
(Tongue-in-cheek) The teacher needs to be more specific!
NeedaChuckle Premium Member almost 7 years ago
Did the same when I was a kid. Now I find it hard to stay within the 300 word limit in letters to the editor.
sandpiper almost 7 years ago
Writing to word count requires a real effort at conciseness and that requires the ability to condense word choices to manageable but cogent levels. One of the most difficult phases of the writing progress: how to get the message across in the most comprehensible way without losing its potency.
As some guy said: if it was easy, anybody could do it
freewaydog almost 7 years ago
Which is why Michael became the writer & Elizabeth did not! ;)
A R V reader almost 7 years ago
The importance of a good grade, she’ll do very very very very very very very very very very……. poorly.
USN1977 almost 7 years ago
A funny book I had was called Singlets, written by a comedian named Rich Hall. It was about “words that are not in the dictionary, but should be.” Some words included:
Essoasso: One who swerves through a service station to avoid a red light.
Hamburgacide: When a beef patty cannot stand being grilled any more and sacrifices itself by falling through the grill onto the hot coals or propane.
Rumphump: The place above the wheel on a school bus that rises into the foot area of your seat.
Schwee: The sound made when a door opens on Star Trek.
Scotchrotor: The wheel left behind when you have exhausted all your tape.
Terma Helper: The extra verbiage one uses to stretch a 600-word essay to the required 1,000.
Sue G almost 7 years ago
A teacher told the class to write a page about anything they wanted to. My friend filled the page with “huh huh huh…”. He did not get a good grade, nor would she let him give it another try.
Night-Gaunt49[Bozo is Boffo] almost 7 years ago
Lynn’s Notes:
I laughed out loud when this idea came to mind. I remember looking up into the void and saying “Thanks” to the spirit who was writing this stuff.
tuslog1964 almost 7 years ago
Bet she gets an F F F F F -——
Writing is hard to do unless you have something to write about. I lost interest in writing early on, because (1) Does not pay well (2) and if you do have a winner, dozens of others will pop out of the woodwork claiming you stole their idea! (My only claim to fame is in TRAINS Magazine Nov. 2009 p.56 – Father and son Quincy, Ill to Buffalo, NY on a Drovers Pass. CB&Q IHB and NYC)
rgcviper almost 7 years ago
Reminds me of a classic Fox Trot …
“The Great Gatsby” (page 1)
“is a-bout a guy” (page 2)
“named Gats-by.” (page 3)
Andi: “THIS is your three-page book report??”
Peter: “The teacher never specified a font size.” (The text in the paper filled each page.)