Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 29, 2018

Who is this Rat and what have they done with the real one?

Rat doesn’t need better enunciation, Pig. It’s you who needs better hearing. No, I didn’t say quality kippers (herring)!

Give the pig some credit. He must have pulled some major strings to land a porpoise chauffeur.

I wish I had a porpoise chauffeur.

Rick Warren fan

Okay, let the porpoise puns begin.

Once again, Pig’s Emily Litella gene asserts itself.

Fun with etymology: “porpoise” comes from Latin porcus [pig] + piscis [fish] = “pig fish”. So the chauffeur may be Pig’s distant relative.

The Monkees Porpoise Song (Not one of their better efforts) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKmPmZoKeP0

Rat wants a purpose driven life? Wow, I’m intrigued that he has said this on my birthday

at least the porpoise’s hat looks official…

at least the porpoise’s hat looks official…

Only Jan 29 and Alexikakos wins the 1918 “most strange retained knowledge” award.Congratulations.btw Why is the porpoise carrying the steering wheel around?

Only Jan 29 and Alexikakos wins the 1918 “most strange retained knowledge” award.Congratulations.btw Why is the porpoise carrying the steering wheel around?

So when Pig fires the porpoise he’ll just say “So long, and thanks for all the fish.”

WOW. Rat must be reading Rick Warren’s Purpose Driven Life.

Pig knows from enunciate?…Really?

Maybe if Rat had his bullhorn then Pig would have heard him.

Contact Rev. Rick Warren. He WROTE the book on a Purpose Driven Life.

Why Stephan don’t get beaten after the pun?

Pig, I have some Q-Tips for you, so you can clean out your little, piggy ears! Whatever Rat wants, he probably does not deserve, anyway….

I’ll bet Pig brought that particular chauffeur on porpoise, rather than accidentally.

…

(Can’t believe nobody’s said this yet—at least, I don’t think they have … )

Flipper flipper faster than liiiiiightning…