Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for May 31, 2018

Mom is going to have do some sewing.

Boy, Hobbes is one bad kitty.

Hobbes, today is also “whack the bejeezus out of your stuffed tiger” day. How delightful!

ROFL! Ok, I was not expecting that at all! What a great plot twist!

Calvin’s “Yes” is absolutely pitch-perfect line delivery. That it’s done in print is astonishing comic timing by Watterson. You can just read the tone perfectly.

Calvin is enjoying the results of his own invention of ‘opposites day.’

If it was Opposite Day, there wasn’t a bee in the first place, and Hobbes wasn’t going to read the comicbooks.

At least they’re not like my children. Every day seems to be Opposition Day for them.

If it is truly opposite day, and you SAY “It’s opposite day,” then the day is now the opposite of Opposite Day, which means it’s not opposite day any more. There, THAT problem solved!

I never forget anything. Especially on Opposite Day.

I’m going to try the Opposite Day defense next time I say the wrong thing to the wife

Turns out it does sting like a bee and Calvin floated like a butterfly.

No, we have yes bananas…

I think it is now Pinata Day.

I never liked the idea of Opposite Day. I came down pretty hard on my children when they tried it. It’s too convenient an excuse for lying. One of those times when I didn’t have a sense of humor.

……or no!;o)

“Dave, you missed yesterday’s meeting and you said you’d be there.”

“True, Mr. Employee of the Month, but yesterday was Opposite Day, so when I said I’d be there I actually meant I wasn’t.”

“Wait, ‘Opposite Day’? So everything you said had the opposite meaning?”

“Right!”

“So… wait, when you told me you didn’t have Pink Eye…”

“I actually have a raging case of it!”

“And when you said you finished the consumer reports…”

“Haven’t even started them!”

“Oh well then, that must mean that when you were asking for a raise, you were really asking for a pay cut!”

“Touche, Mr. Employee of the Month, touche!”

Anyone else notice that GoComics has the “Get Rid of Slimy GirlS” Club listed up top as the “No Girls Allowed Club”? And… “All Babysitters Must Quit”? They seem like poor translations of the real thing or embarrassing oversights.

I should have known…

I’d stay in that tree a little bit longer, Hobbes….