The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for May 08, 2018

Leave off the hot-buttered Rolls, too

That Honda over there would work with a lo-fit diet.

After you’ve eaten a whole lot and you have too much junk in the trunk then you worry about the low cars diet. After awhile though you’ll be back in your low rider jeans.

In that case it’s by-ped.

Oh, so THIS is the Paleo Diet.

There’s a lot of oil in cars…

and what with all that grease, they’ll give you gas.

You get more fiber from mattresses and furniture….

a filling alternative, once you learn to crack open those apartment buildings.

Lo-car diet. Corvette, Lamborghini, Fiat Spider, Porsche. So many to chose from. I can’t make up my mind.

Two Godzillas, now you’re talking. Oh no, there goes Tokyo, go go Godzilla!

Cars aggravate his autoimmune disease.

Careful with the electric cars…

The Honda he ate with the Takata air bag gave him gas.

He might like cream cheese and carviar.

The real problem is you’re hungry again 15 minutes after eating a Japanese car

No thanks, I’m in the mood for Italian. Got any Fiats?

Hey, that Edsel is past the expiration date.

Ah, Come on! Its only a 4 cylinder.

If he is on a low-carb diet, give him a car with fuel injection.

Your meal is ready… please take your Seat.

Shifting gears to a new diet is always hard.

“Wouldn’t you really rather have a Buick?”

What the heck… Give me some steer-fried rice burner.

The fins are what’s fattening; don’t eat the fins!

How about some nice locks on an Edsel?