Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for May 25, 2018

Different standards. Scooter figures if he can’t smell ‘em, they ain’t worth squat.

A little jealous, are we, Scooter?

Well, Corky likes the little ones that keep getting underfoot, and who, when stepped on, we call Squeakinese.

Scooter hates this one. Undignified!

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/wqVp/geico-running-of-the-bulldogs

“Too soon made glad. Too easily impressed. " thinks Scooter.

Scooter thinks that all roles should go to Miss Millie High Maintenance.

After all Scooter has better asthectics.

And higher class friends AND he’s never bees kicked out of the Ballard Petunia and Cactus Society for crimes we won’t mention here.

Scooter can’t totally claim to dislike small dogs….

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But you just can’t expect Corky to rate them on the same scale.

What can you expect from someone who calls herself Corky, Scooter?

Okay, I’ll bite. Which one’s Scooter, and which is Corky?

In the recesses of his mind, he held a special dark place for that finicky feline Morris the Cat.

Listen to Scooter. We all know that he is a pup of discriminating tastes.

“Aw, put a cork in it, grrr…”

Scooter does not like adorable kittens, cute cats, smarmy squirrels, brilliant birds, or petite poodles ( with the exception of Miss Millie High Maintenance ). He prefers his t.v. product promoters be big and strong, powerful and intelligent, witty and urbane, and superior to humans and other animals – just like he is.

Scooter sees himself as a Dalmatian riding proudly above the Clydesdales in the Parade of Life.

Scooter knows Trouble personally, and can tell stories about what he’s really like off camera.

Maybe try FB

It annoys Scooter that he is not in those ads. He could do better than those other pets, if only Corky would find someone to give him an audition.