Greasy, greasy meatball subs. But that’s not what gave him the heart attack at 47. He worked for that one, conditioning himself to spend long hours binge-watching streaming 1960’s sitcoms. His record was 40 hours of straight time in front of the TV, getting up only to use the bathroom or answer the door for pizza or sub delivery. Uncle Pete was a true pro.
Uncle Pete had not wished his passing to become a burden financially for his family members, so Uncle Pete had chosen years ago to purchase an affordable sub-sidized cremation service plan..
It’s true. Great Aunt Zelda was an old school bacon grease sandwich eater. We had to burn her ashes 3 times to keep them from clumping. She wanted to be scattered over the stockyards in Chicago.
It didn’t take long. He was one of Uncle Pete’s boys. Uncle Pete had been the top guy at a local precinct. Not my local precinct, but I knew him and we’d had common interests and occasional reasons to act toward the same ends. “Had” was the operative word. Uncle Pete had been retired with full honors and a twenty-one gun salute to a pine box under a well-kept lawn. His boys had the impression that it hadn’t been an accident. From what I’d heard, I mostly agreed. All the big boys calling shots had called it an accident and walked away. But it was giving this guy a meatball sandwich sized case of indigestion, seeming a bit more like a squeaky wheel being greased than a simple matter of a wrong turn into an ongoing drive-by.
Brass Orchid Premium Member about 6 years ago
Greasy, greasy meatball subs. But that’s not what gave him the heart attack at 47. He worked for that one, conditioning himself to spend long hours binge-watching streaming 1960’s sitcoms. His record was 40 hours of straight time in front of the TV, getting up only to use the bathroom or answer the door for pizza or sub delivery. Uncle Pete was a true pro.
Meh~tdology, fka Pepelaputr about 6 years ago
He wasn’t cremated.
He was fried.
Howard'sMyHero about 6 years ago
Pawing through the ashes of cremated relatives makes for great family fun and entertainment ….
Mad-ge Dish Soap about 6 years ago
Ahhh, Rocky Mountain Oysters on Rye Bread Hoagies, Breaded and Deep Fried. Let the party begin.
Say What Now‽ Premium Member about 6 years ago
Kids, don’t do snuff!
Hugh B. Hayve about 6 years ago
Peter paid the ultimate sacrifice according to the laws of Thanos.
The Old Wolf about 6 years ago
Those meatball subs were amazing, and so were the roast beef sandwiches. The local delis in Little Italy were unbeatable.
Mad-ge Dish Soap about 6 years ago
You sunk my meatball submarine.
INGSOC about 6 years ago
Uncle Pete had not wished his passing to become a burden financially for his family members, so Uncle Pete had chosen years ago to purchase an affordable sub-sidized cremation service plan..
cooganm Premium Member about 6 years ago
Just a pinch ’tween cheek and gum
6turtle9 about 6 years ago
On top of ole Petey, all covered in cheese, I lost my poor meatball, when somebody sneezed.
Andylit Premium Member about 6 years ago
It’s true. Great Aunt Zelda was an old school bacon grease sandwich eater. We had to burn her ashes 3 times to keep them from clumping. She wanted to be scattered over the stockyards in Chicago.
Larry Miller Premium Member about 6 years ago
Those kids look familiar.
Brass Orchid Premium Member about 6 years ago
It didn’t take long. He was one of Uncle Pete’s boys. Uncle Pete had been the top guy at a local precinct. Not my local precinct, but I knew him and we’d had common interests and occasional reasons to act toward the same ends. “Had” was the operative word. Uncle Pete had been retired with full honors and a twenty-one gun salute to a pine box under a well-kept lawn. His boys had the impression that it hadn’t been an accident. From what I’d heard, I mostly agreed. All the big boys calling shots had called it an accident and walked away. But it was giving this guy a meatball sandwich sized case of indigestion, seeming a bit more like a squeaky wheel being greased than a simple matter of a wrong turn into an ongoing drive-by.
Sisyphos about 6 years ago
Wise-ash kids shouldn’t be allowed to play with Uncle Pete!