Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for October 11, 2018

I want a matching sphincter jewelry set that includes a matching sphincter ring, a sphincter necklace, and sphincter earrings. I’d like a sphincter bolo tie for my boyfriend. Cufflinks, too. Did I forget anything?Wait. A sphincter bracelet, one for my wrist and one for my ankle.

Representing 65 years of good service…

LOVE IS:

Realizing that someone you know got lost on the internet at the same place as you.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/0c/1b/76/0c1b76248dfc2e90f72f1f0c52f77bc6—s-ads-retro-ads.jpg

(Really, this is where I stopped just before clicking on FA.)

She just has to work harder to become someone’s main squeeze ….

You’ll just have to buy her another case of Cracker Jackholes, and maybe she’ll get the prize she wants.

These word balloons are word boxes for more fun I would guess.

He is not known around town as The Big Sphincter for nothing.

They seem to relish the moment of what they are discussing, and what they are about to eat..

Note that the All-American wiener dogs are the only thing rendered color. Or choler. Symbolic of their healthy wholesomeness, the one thing in today’s FA that can bring a bounty of health from your cheeks to your sphincter.

“Oh you’ll get the medallions. You’ll get them. Keep eating. It’s a long-known side effect, those medallions.”

Just eat your Thursday hot dog and stop whining!

Really!

Rings. Signet. Okay. Medallion. Okay. Difference? Negligible.

Less fuss. Less muss. (More lame.)

Like a sphincter rising from the ashes, I will ride the tube steak beast to glory and unite the rings for my Lady of Lame!

I have never eaten a hot dog that red. It has to be real! The redder the bedder.