Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for October 28, 2018

Make like a banana and peel out, then a hockey puck laying rubber for a block.

Methinks old Bill is literally in more need of a literary license than one for driving since he would surely fail the vision test ….

Western language has evolved over the ages, from simple grunts and gesticulations, to various tribal dialects, to Latin and its derivatives, to the polyglot swamp of English, and finally, back to American.

“There is no darkness but ignorance”

– quote from Twelfth Night

“One foot on sea, and one on shore, To one thing constant never”

– quote from Much Ado About Nothing

“There is a world elsewhere”

– quote from Coriolanus

“Travelers never did lie, Though fools at home condemn them”

– quote from The Tempest

“I like this place and could willingly waste my time in it”

– quote from As You Like It

“‘To’ is a preposition,‘come’ is a verb.”-Lenny Bruce.

Well tubby, or not tubby. ~ John Wayne

One of those little eddies where British and American English flow against each other.

What would they have called it, instead of “photo ID”? Sketch ID? Approximate Line Drawing Likeness (or ALDL)? Or maybe That Thing Where Your Eyes Always Look Crossed (TTWYEALC)?

A see and eye guide dog riding shotgun on the passenger seat may be to Shakespeare, William’s advantage to help him with his driving ability since Shakespeare, William’s inability to see properly seems to cross over into the other side of the road..

“TB or not TB, that is congestion…”— Unknown

“Womp, womp”— some Trump guy

Oh Willie!, hang a white, hear…Elmer Fudd

America and England are two countries separated by a common language.

And licentious is an adjective.

“Ahhh, seatbelts are for kids.” -Fred Flintstone

I heartily approve of verbing nouns, but don’t approve of nouning verbs. I think the UK has lost this match (according to me, that is).

Young Billy had a lead foot, and no particular place to go, he only drove two horses and a grandiloquent cargo, comparing this, much ado-ing that, eschewing idle chit chat, the overlords could not contain him, he claimed their licence ersatz.

May I check your artistic license?

Don’t be taken by a shrewd person with a pretty face and isn’t the real deal.

Scurrilous! I have it on good authority that Sweet William was not only not cross-eyed (though some of his fictional lovers were star-crossed) but indeed had the Look of Eagles, a penetrating and powerful glance.

Furthermore, to account for the acronymic, we must conclude that a word has been omitted from this British imperialist knavery: Driver and Vehicle Licensing Agency. No?

Down with Imperialism!

How the mighty have fallen. Can’t see where they’re going, much less whilst driving their autocars. “An autocar? An autocar? Gad! What have I been missing?!”