Peanuts by Charles Schulz for April 26, 2019

(202) 456-1111

Hi bud!

“We’re sorry, your call cannot be completed as dialed. Please check the number and dial again.”

Relax Charlie Brown

No, the suicide hotline does NOT offer suggestions on methods. :D

Welcome to the loser hotline, all of our staff are busy doing something else right now, but if you stay on the line someone will be with you eventually, if they can’t find someone better to talk to.

Maybe you should start a support group instead, Charlie Brown.

Just lose the blues, CB.

Nowadays there would be an app for that on Charlie Brown’s smartphone.

Too bad .. this strip was written in 1972 … even before the primitive video game of Pong was developed. CB can’t even claim a victory in an old video game. Alas CB, there’s always the challenge of your younger sister to a game of tic-tac-toe or marbles or checkers. Start small …

Tommy Tutone recommends calling 867-5309 for a good time…

Charlie Brown you always get a busy signal when you dial your own number!

Hello Charlie Brown. Won’t you be my neighbor? I like you just as you are, and you are just fine.

You’ve got to stop listening to your friends, Charlie Brown.

Try Amazon. That always cheers me up.

You have reached the main office of the Chicago Cubs.. (sorry, couldn’t resist!)

If you wish to end all your sufferings and dwell in paradise, call 666.

Stop calling me! I can’t help you!

The managers of the Royals and the Marlins can identify, Chuck

I remember when you had Dial-a-Prayer and the Time-lady you could call.

There are times that I can relate to Chuck. I barely even win anything at all. Thanks for reminding me I’m not the only one, Charlie.